Was I the Villain?

[Water-Lily]

I am not comfortable going into all the specifics with my ex

I was watching this Youtube video about a woman who married a guy she was never attracted to, and basically wasted his time

Everyone said she was the "villain in this story" and it made me think of how I hurt my ex

Though he and I weren't together very long (we were friend first then were together for a few months)

Looking back, I too wasn't very attracted to him. My discomfort grew and I decided it was time to let it go

However I was also pretty nasty during the break up and said something I am ashamed of

I probably hurt him real bad, and now I feel like the bad person entirely

 

[deedeme]

We all make mistakes, that's just how it is. If you gave it a try in the past and it didn't work out because you didn't feel real attraction, that's ok. How is one supposed to know what they're truly seeking in a partner if they don't try things?

Sure, some people may hurt during the process, but again, that's just how it is.
If you fear that you hurt him due to bad stuff you said, you could also try to reach out and apologise. It's never too late and you shouldn't seek his understanding, but a clear conscience because you deserve to feel at peace with yourself. I've done the same with an old friendship as well while I was trying to heal.

Also don't mind what people say in the comment sections. When people are bored they love pointing fingers at others to spend their time.

 

[SexyIncél]

However I was also pretty nasty during the break up and said something I am ashamed of

I probably hurt him real bad, and now I feel like the bad person entirely

Eh, we've all been villains. What matters is learning to become more of an antihero

 

[the old man]

unless the breakup is mutual then inevitably one person is going to get hurt, yes by all means try to lessen the hurt ( unless they deserve it ) and we all say things we regret in the heat of the moment it's just the way it is, apologise if you feel you need to then let it go.

 

[Silent Raindrops]

Kind of like with my ex-wife when we divorced in 1999, bitter things were said between the both of us. A lot of it was just things we blurted out without thinking, whether or not it was true.

It's just how it goes sometimes. Without realizing it, you're just trying to win a battle, and you speak without giving it a second thought.