wanted to ctb because of heartbreak now not sure

[raindrops]

I was with my ex-partner for 11 years, everyday I can't stop thinking about him! I've been single 4 months now. He was the one who left me, I come home and he had taken all of his things. Really broke my heart.

I met up with my ex at around 10 in the evening its now 1:28 in the morning, must of spent at least 3 hours together, I don't know how to feel, I feel hopeful we might get back together although he hasn't said anything, the way he treated me tonight was so loving...
He cuddled me, kissed me, mistakenly called me "baby" during conversation. Then we had sex... I feel so stupid.
Should I of done it? We were together 11 years, then leaves me and now 4 months later asks to meet up and says we should start having fun.
I couldn't read him at all emotionally, yes he was loving, seemed caring, kissing me and holding me because I was weak and cried in front of him but he held me!!

When the relationship ended, I kinda fell out with his family too... Do you think I'm on my way to getting back together or more heartache?
He has this girl he speaks with who lives in Poland, he lives in England a few towns from me (just saying) he video calls this Polish girl, told me he loves her, they share the same music interests, they share memes, I even know they have matching T-Shirt's ffs. When I asked him earlier about loving someone else he said "We all say stupid things, love is a strong word"
I'll be honest, I want him and only him, I want to reconnect, be wiser and stronger as a couple. Is this possible? Ohhh I dunno why I'm asking here. Without him I don't want to live.
He really is amazing, I'm hoping the universe or whatever tf controls this world spiritually will bring us and wants us together. Am I dreaming omg

 

[WastedSpace]

11 years is an insanely long time!! I think it's totally understandable that you are struggling. My longest relationship was 4 years and we broke up 18 months ago and I'm definitely not over it - so I can't even imagine what you're going through.

 

[Whenhopelostmemory]

I was with my ex-partner for 11 years, everyday I can't stop thinking about him! I've been single 4 months now. He was the one who left me, I come home and he had taken all of his things. Really broke my heart.

I met up with my ex at around 10 in the evening its now 1:28 in the morning, must of spent at least 3 hours together, I don't know how to feel, I feel hopeful we might get back together although he hasn't said anything, the way he treated me tonight was so loving...
He cuddled me, kissed me, mistakenly called me "baby" during conversation. Then we had sex... I feel so stupid.
Should I of done it? We were together 11 years, then leaves me and now 4 months later asks to meet up and says we should start having fun.
I couldn't read him at all emotionally, yes he was loving, seemed caring, kissing me and holding me because I was weak and cried in front of him but he held me!!

When the relationship ended, I kinda fell out with his family too... Do you think I'm on my way to getting back together or more heartache?
He has this girl he speaks with who lives in Poland, he lives in England a few towns from me (just saying) he video calls this Polish girl, told me he loves her, they share the same music interests, they share memes, I even know they have matching T-Shirt's ffs. When I asked him earlier about loving someone else he said "We all say stupid things, love is a strong word"
I'll be honest, I want him and only him, I want to reconnect, be wiser and stronger as a couple. Is this possible? Ohhh I dunno why I'm asking here. Without him I don't want to live.
He really is amazing, I'm hoping the universe or whatever tf controls this world spiritually will bring us and wants us together. Am I dreaming omg

I feel you ... I'm still not over my ex from last year..he's with someone new and I've tried moving on with other ppl but everytime someone gets close i back off and say I'm still not over my ex...it hurts to know that ur not there reason for happiness or excitement..it hurts to know they don't want ur love and attention anymore but at the end of the day love is a mutual feeling ... if the counterpart does not revert back u can't Really call it love..it's becomes a longing...and it's entirely upto u to either move on or live with the wound for the rest of ur life....and for me rn I have no idea...o still cannot accept someone new even though I have met many many men with whom I felt strongly about...I still go back to the memories wth my ex and relive those moments..don't know how long I can take it
..I wish u good luck