Voices in my head, but they're all just me

[AmanSilvers]

My thoughts tend to come in the form of several different figures/voices. For example, I've got one that is "evil" and fond of self destructing, and another that is more kind but not overly so, and some others with more niche purposes.
They are all just facets of myself, and it's a choice I have made to frame my thoughts in this way. It is easier to make the "evil" voice stop yapping if I use another one to be the voice of reason. It feels a little ridiculous sometimes, but it's usually effective.
I was thinking about it earlier in the evening because I was having an especially hard time putting an end to some self-destructive thoughts and I realized that the way I was thinking might seem kind of bonkers.
Sometimes my thoughts just come as they are, a unified voice of myself, but sometimes I put them through the prism to split them up. So, I don't think I am totally bonkers for doing it?

Anyway I am curious how other people experience their thoughts/inner world. I am sure there is proper reading about it, but I've not looked into it. Tell me about the way you think.


Not really related side note: my first therapy appointment is coming up in less than a week now. I've got mixed feelings, but I've got to at least try it, right? xd

 

[I Me & Myself]

Hi! Same here. This is very healthy, actually.

If you "Split up" your thoughts and assign them to a prt of you, it is easier to figure out your needs. Cause your evil thoughts have different needs than your tired thoughts.

Of course, all of these are still you and you need to take responsibility for the entirety of yourself. You're one whole self, and that's important to stay aware of.

I also assign some thoughts to a self destructive part and when I tell him to shut up, address him by name, it's a lot easier than to try and surpress the thoughts normally.

It's a therapy mechanism called "Internal Family System", look it up! May be helpful to you.

Good luck on your therapy appointment <3 I hope you and your therapist have good chemistry, every try is worth it.

 

[itsitbit]

I don't think you're bonkers! If it works for you and is effective it's not ridiculous c: I think this sort of thing is not that uncommon or strange, and I feel like it's actually very logical in a way, because in addressing a thought directly you are automatically identifying it as a thought, and creating 'space' between the thought and you as an observer. I feel like assigning roles to work through things mentally makes a lot of sense to help in identifying certain recurring needs, wants, fears, etc. that pop up a lot in your mind.

I don't deliberately frame my thoughts in this way but I feel I have something similar going on, though it's not always consistent. Sometimes I have periods of having a unified single internal monologue, and other times, usually when I'm quite stressed out, my thoughts will sort of end up feeling more like a back-and-forth between themselves. Sometimes the amount that I 'hear' is also very inconsistent, so there have been times where the thoughts have been very clear, times where the thoughts are like catching the tail-end of a sentence, and times where I'm aware there was some kind of dialogue but am unable to recall the content. There's also times where I think I'm in a single internal monologue only to realize midway through that I don't exactly understand what I'm talking about and that the train of thought doesn't feel like it "belongs" to me.

In my case I have been suspecting that I might have some structural dissociation issues that may be the cause of this, but even if that is the reason for why my personal internal experience is like that, I still think that perceiving thoughts as different facets of yourself is a common thing that many people do even if they don't experience structural dissociation.

I hope your therapy appointment goes well! Trying something new is really brave and something to be proud of c: