Train VS benzos+opioids mix

[donttalktome]

Both seem like a coin toss with uncalculable odds. I take 20mg xans daily so my tolerance is skyhigh, but i have 0 tolerance for opioids, and i can get oxy 80s or almost any opioid script. Which would you choose? Guillotine by train or take as much drugs as possible and try to OD somewhere secluded where people won't find me? I always dreamed of accidental OD as cause of death but it will never happen. No other methods are viable as I don't live alone and have no resources. Keep in my mind im in chronic unbearable pain and i have 10+ diseases and my body is barely holding together, i might collapse even without anything, that's the reason i'm considering this risky way of OD.