You can find pride in your uniqueness. :)
We might be the minority, we might be weird here..
Doesn't mean we can't enjoy life in our own way.
Doesn't mean we can't meet other people or date or whatever if we want to :)
Yeah it may take longer for us than for normies but its far from impossible.
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I like the positive intentions behind your post. I understand what you are talking about at its core.
On a reflection: that comic provokes in me a profoundly disgusting and macabre feeling. The whole idea of the "in" and "out" seems to me to be the most corrosive, disgusting, vomit-inducing, eerie, ghastly idea ever. It is enough to send chills down my spine. Even though the tone is humorous, the depiction of "being weird" in a caricatured way provokes in me immense eerieness. There is something about human society, about its social dynamics that provoke in me an immense and nauseating disgust that overwhelms all my consciousness. The idea of the "normal" is also ghastly for me. I do sincerely believe the "normal" is constructed, and we are all castrated by forces often outside our control that make us shallow and exclusionary. Depth and non-standard interests being considered "weird" seems to me to be something profoundly macabre and lurid in ways I yet cannot fully put into words. This is what I feel.
I just had to let that paragraph out of my chest. I need to vent. But thanks for your well-intentioned answer. But I couldn't stop reflecting on the social dynamics depicted in the comic, they make want to vomit.
I know what you mean.
I experience the same thing due to mental illness and meds. The brain is not functioning normally, and is all the time depressed and isolated. Is that the same with you?
When you see other people radiating the opposite energy, that of joy, it hurts inside, because you wonder what you did to deserve such pain. For me, substance abuse hindered my normal functioning and growth into being a normal human being. But it seems we don't have second chances in this life.
I've endured this mental pain for at least 10 years, because I'm mainly scared of God's punishment.
Is your experience similar?
I feel profoundly lost due to my neurodivergence and inability to interact with human beings deeply. I feel completely displaced in human society. I feel I often fall into a bad mental space that feeds onto itself. It then pollutes my mind and hinders my social interactions in all sorts of ways. These days I've been more and more depressed and desperate as I see where my life is heading and desperately try to swim against the current.
I do not fear God's punishment because the abrahamic god is to me so clearly a fiction and a product of human social dynamics. A deep study of the bible, archeology and history conclusively disproves the major pillars of the abrahamic religions. I see religion as a tool of social control and yet another outlet for human farcicality and performance.
Don't mean to offend you, but you can see I am not religious. If you are then take this as you will.
Thing is, you truly never know what someone's going through. The people you saw radiating joy may very well have been in the most fucked up state imaginable before. Whether or not that's true is something you'll never know, which is why you can see their lives as a tiny glimmer of potential. Everyone really does have potential to do what they desire, and that potential can translate into something beautiful like they have.
Everyone has their quirks. However, I completely understand what you mean when you describe feeling like that could never be you. For years, I've been looking at the outside world and hating myself internally for not having the same social life or connections people have, constantly thinking why can't I have their joy? Why must I suffer? But looking at those people as a potential destination for me has helped a bit.
Yes it's definitely harder to achieve that goal when you're mentally ill, but like the other user said, you can learn to embrace your uniqueness. However much of an outcast you believe you are, there's truly people in the world who share the same interests as you, the same values and the same perspectives.
I am sorry you went through similar suffering. The suffering that human beings endure really makes me feel profoundly sad and evokes in me deep empathy. I really dread how much suffering there is in the world and how things could be so much better and happier for human beings if things were different.
I am well aware of "people have their own problems", though I can assure you that those in particular were in a much better position in terms of happiness and all-around vitality. It is not about problems. It is about being a human being. I don't feel like a human being, but feel like something else. I feel a profound alienation since birth and never found my place.
You finish your post talking about there being people out there similar to me. That is very sweet. I do still carry a faint hope there are people out there who will not judge me and that I can connect with. People I don't have to perform around, but can be my true self. Thank you for the answer.
