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Harry Callahan
- Feb 12, 2023
- 254
i have to live this life where i don't even feel like a real person, i feel so disconnected and it's torturous. my migraine won't go away and i'm having anxiety attacks daily. i can't breathe and my legs are so shaky i can't stand. i hate knowing that i'll never have the chance to be who i want or do what i want, it's just not possible and i'll never be happy because of this. i have constant fantasies of living and then i feel even worse because i know they're not possible. i want to hurry and die, but i can't just yet. more than anything, i really want to live but it's just not possible. i can't live this miserably forever, i can't even handle it right now. even if everything gets better, there are so many things that just can't change and i can't live like this. no amount of advice or coping mechanisms help because it's just a fact that i will never be who or what i want to be. i am such a waste of life. it's so unfair to me and everyone else that i was born with no actual chance of being happy.
