Venting Terminal disease. Feel like I have to ctb.. angry.. anyone else..?

[shame]

Cause of incurable illness my suffering is a pure hell. I'm already done. Memories and family make me feel angry, cause I can't change the fact it is what it is. I'm counting every day. No options at least for slightly better future, everything were tried.
Anyone else feels the same way? Like you can't suffer any longer, can't change anything and fucking anger, cause you have to leave behind so many happy and gorgeous moments, that could be your life?

 

[NegevChina]

Cause of incurable illness my suffering is a pure hell. I'm already done. Memories and family make me feel angry, cause I can't change the fact it is what it is. I'm counting every day. No options at least for slightly better future, everything were tried.
Anyone else feels the same way? Like you can't suffer any longer, can't change anything and fucking anger, cause you have to leave behind so many happy and gorgeous moments, that could be your life?

I feel the same. Incurable illnesses combined together to make my life hell. Im 57. Could have lived much longer but 2 incurable health issues combined with my CPTSD have ruined my life over the last 6 months. What's more agonizing is the last issue happened following me trying to get healthier by reducing weight. Im just praying for a miracle to happen for me to dye naturally but that isn't likely to happen. Ill have to CTB soon but agonized by the pain ill cause my loved ones.

 

[excinephile]

Yes, the depression meds I was on damaged me permanently and now I'm disabled and my life is pure hell. No hope for improvement. My whole past and future just dumped on a trashpile within a few days. No one can live with such pain and regret and yet still here I am almost a year later. I hate this shit so much. I tried to be positive about life but as it stands it really would have been much preferable to never have been born.

 

[shame]

Yes, the depression meds I was on damaged me permanently and now I'm disabled and my life is pure hell. No hope for improvement. My whole past and future just dumped on a trashpile within a few days. No one can live with such pain and regret and yet still here I am almost a year later. I hate this shit so much. I tried to be positive about life but as it stands it really would have been much preferable to never have been born.

If you don't mind me asking, what kind of meds caused that?

 

[affirmatice]

exact, literally exact same thoughts.

 

[amerie]

Chronic illness literally sounds like living hell and they 100% should have priority when it comes to assisted suicide idc. Man your feelings are valid and if you are in pain I hope that you find relief.

Yes, the depression meds I was on damaged me permanently and now I'm disabled and my life is pure hell. No hope for improvement. My whole past and future just dumped on a trashpile within a few days. No one can live with such pain and regret and yet still here I am almost a year later. I hate this shit so much. I tried to be positive about life but as it stands it really would have been much preferable to never have been born.

This is actually heartbreaking, you took depression meds to find happiness and they ironically made your life worse :(

 

[excinephile]

If you don't mind me asking, what kind of meds caused that?

Initially Lexapro, then evrerything got worsened by APs they put me on in the ward.