gurowuro
Member
- May 29, 2023
- 5
i hate myself and i hate her. i stopped to care for a relationship shortly after our breakup but the fact that she refuses to acknowledge or accept that she's done damage to me really hurts bad. she cut me off to avoid responsibility and accountability, that really crushed my heart so much… ever since she lied (and probably cheated) on me it genuinely traumatized me and changed how i view any interaction with ANYONE EVER. i developed a bipolar disorder shortly after and NOW im going through severe anxiety attacks at work to the point where i genuinely cant work full shifts and im probably gonna get fired. i fucking hate this and i hate how weak i am for letting a lying piece of shit take so much control of my life and emotions. i really love and care for her, i wish i didnt. i wish none of these feelings i hold for her were real. its destroying my life and i act like im positive about the possible future that i could have but im really done with trying, i just want to rest for a bit but the world keeps spinning and i cant take a moment to breathe. everything hurts. i wish i never found out about her lies and i could live in a delusion, id be sm happier. i see her social media once in a while, seeing her be so happy hurts so much after everything ive endured and i still feel so empty, sad and angry. she refused to face what she did to me in favor of her own tranquility and it makes my heart ache everytime i remind myself. i just hope for accountability, to see her be genuinely sorry. idk if itd change anything but it would just ease that thought from me
