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Chemical Animal

Chemical Animal

"I was born out of time, I'm not meant to be here"
Jan 24, 2023
44
I wonder if anyone is recovering against their own will because of circumstances...

Well, since my executive dysfunction and mood swings between depression and feeling energized keep me from choosing a CTB method and putting an effort to gather the stuff necessary for it, I have no other choice but to recover.

But I have no energy or motivation to do anything because no reward is certain, and I only put an effort in an activity if the desired results/outcome are 999% guaranteed. I have no friends and no social skills, so there's no reason to get outside. My family is falling apart, so not even a support network is something I have. I accepted that I will die a virgin since I'm ugly, uninteresting and a fucking weirdo. The only thing that can fix my problems now is huge amounts of money, and only a fucking miracle like winning the lottery can change my life for the better. Recovery is way too hard when you have nothing to live for, but I have to because I'm so dysfunctional to the point I need someone to plan my CTB for me...
 
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Eudaimonic

Eudaimonic

I want to fade away.
Aug 11, 2023
842
Yes. I am essentially forced to try to recover because I'm not able to access any reliable methods and have nowhere to attempt for the time being, and I have executive dysfunction as well and very little energy and motivation. I think it's likely to fail; that's why I still tentatively plan to CTB a little over a year from now, but we'll see where I'm at then. At least for now, giving up is a luxury I cannot afford.

Btw, I can relate, I need a lot of money to put a dent in my problems.
 
Last edited:
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thenamingofcats

annihilation anxiety
Apr 19, 2024
482
I think recovery against your will turns into pretending. Times when I've had to because I would get kicked out or get fired (something like that) it just teaches you how to hide it better.
 
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Linda

Linda

Member
Jul 30, 2020
1,907
I wonder if anyone is recovering against their own will because of circumstances...

Well, since my executive dysfunction and mood swings between depression and feeling energized keep me from choosing a CTB method and putting an effort to gather the stuff necessary for it, I have no other choice but to recover.

But I have no energy or motivation to do anything because no reward is certain, and I only put an effort in an activity if the desired results/outcome are 999% guaranteed. I have no friends and no social skills, so there's no reason to get outside. My family is falling apart, so not even a support network is something I have. I accepted that I will die a virgin since I'm ugly, uninteresting and a fucking weirdo. The only thing that can fix my problems now is huge amounts of money, and only a fucking miracle like winning the lottery can change my life for the better. Recovery is way too hard when you have nothing to live for, but I have to because I'm so dysfunctional to the point I need someone to plan my CTB for me...
"I only put an effort in an activity if the desired results/outcome are 999% guaranteed." That's not usually the best strategy. I wonder whether it is actually the root of all your problems. My own strategey has always been to tackle only things that have some reasonable chance of success, but I know I won't always be successful in them. The overall result has been that for every failure I also got several successes.
I know that you can't just make motivation appear from nowhere, but perhaps you could try changing your outlook on things. Failure doesnt matter, if you succeed more often than you fail. Doing nothing guarantees no failures, but it guarantes no successes too.
 
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L

LaughingGoat

Mage
Apr 11, 2024
589
"I only put an effort in an activity if the desired results/outcome are 999% guaranteed." That's not usually the best strategy. I wonder whether it is actually the root of all your problems. My own strategey has always been to tackle only things that have some reasonable chance of success, but I know I won't always be successful in them. The overall result has been that for every failure I also got several successes.
I know that you can't just make motivation appear from nowhere, but perhaps you could try changing your outlook on things. Failure doesnt matter, if you succeed more often than you fail. Doing nothing guarantees no failures, but it guarantes no successes too.
Agreed, this is a form of all or nothing thinking. Just about everything in life has a chance of "failure", the mindset shift to understanding things may fail and focusing on what you can control (basically taking a process-oriented vs goal-oriented approach) will lead to a much healthier and functional outlook.
 
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Warlord's Pulse

Warlord's Pulse

Time to end this endless war
May 27, 2024
203
That mindset is dangerous, you're most likely doomed to live in a limbo where you're not dead neither living well
 

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