Venting Really struggling at work

[rigsid]

At work atm. First day back after a week off from a suicide attempt.

I've had such high stress levels all day and I don't even know why.

It is giving me palpitations and making me feel even more horrible.

I still have half of this shitty day left.

Im hoping the palpitations give me a heart attack and I drop dead.

 

[Forveleth]

Take a minutes to take some deep breaths. I have definitely had some freak out moments at work. Try not to think about how much of the day you have left. Focus on the next little bit of time. You can do it.

 

[Willow]

I totally relate to this. Work can be so incredibly stressful especially after returning after an attempt. Is there anything you can look forward to, like a lunch break or what you will have for dinner?

 

[Wolff603]

I feel like the feeling of stress or the initial feeling (even if a week after) of an attempt is not talked about enough, with its effects on having no desire to live and feeling like crap. It is hard, but although I may sound like I'm saying some complete bs, the main thing you can do is breathe in and breathe out or even sneak listening to a song or just anything to escape the moment for now atleast. Just don't dwell on it.

 

[joey2424]

I'm so sorry you're going through this. To get to the point of attempting and then having to go back to pretending everything is fine must be so hard. Once your work day is over I hope you can find some way of taking care of yourself in this state. Like maybe taking a nap or some comfort food. I hope things get easier for you.

 

[rigsid]

I'm so sorry you're going through this. To get to the point of attempting and then having to go back to pretending everything is fine must be so hard. Once your work day is over I hope you can find some way of taking care of yourself in this state. Like maybe taking a nap or some comfort food. I hope things get easier for you.

Thanks for the suggestion. I got some take out. I still feel awful but at least I'm not hungry.

Suffering this much is just really driving me insane.

 

[joey2424]

Thanks for the suggestion. I got some take out. I still feel awful but at least I'm not hungry.

Suffering this much is just really driving me insane.

I know the feeling - though I've never had to go through a day like the one you're having. Your suffering must be excruciating. For me, when im my lowest, I don't look forward to anything and every second feels like pain. Food is my only comfort. I let myself look forward to a tasty meal at least. That keeps me going while the time passes. I really hope that your suffering eases soon.

 

[rigsid]

I know the feeling - though I've never had to go through a day like the one you're having. Your suffering must be excruciating. For me, when im my lowest, I don't look forward to anything and every second feels like pain. Food is my only comfort. I let myself look forward to a tasty meal at least. That keeps me going while the time passes. I really hope that your suffering eases soon.

It is excruciating. It's such anguish rn that I am crying from the pain of it.

I desperately want to die. For this to stop. About to sleep which is the next best thing.

Thank you for the kind words. It makes the pain just a little less.

 

[joey2424]

It is excruciating. It's such anguish rn that I am crying from the pain of it.

I desperately want to die. For this to stop. About to sleep which is the next best thing.

Thank you for the kind words. It makes the pain just a little less.

My heart breaks for you. I do hope that you find a different way to make the pain stop. But I understand how that can feel impossible, because it does for me too. I hope you have a restful sleep for now. I'm glad that talking is helping a little. You don't have to be alone. You can message me whenever.

 

[l1ablemistakes]

Pretending to be normal and putting a fake smile on can be excruciating. I feel your pain, stranger. It's so alienating and distracting going around pretending you aren't thinking of killing yourself. I hope you feel a bit better in the morning and I hope you find joy in something that isn't death <3

 

[Willow]

Thinking of you. Your pain sounds overwhelming. I'm so very sorry

 

[kitkatt]

At work atm. First day back after a week off from a suicide attempt.

I've had such high stress levels all day and I don't even know why.

It is giving me palpitations and making me feel even more horrible.

I still have half of this shitty day left.

Im hoping the palpitations give me a heart attack and I drop dead.

Having to work when you're doing your best just to survive is not fair. I hate it so much every day at work is relatively easy but I still have such a hard time getting by. I wish I didn't have to fight so hard just to survive maybe then I'd have a chance to wanna be here. Sending virtual hugs because this shits hard I get it

 

[rigsid]

Pretending to be normal and putting a fake smile on can be excruciating. I feel your pain, stranger. It's so alienating and distracting going around pretending you aren't thinking of killing yourself. I hope you feel a bit better in the morning and I hope you find joy in something that isn't death <3

I feel the same in the morning sadly. I just wake up like this. It's exhausting. I just want to sleep forever. Sleeping is the only time I have peace.