Discussion question for parents of minors on SS. Once suicidal always suicidal?

[Insomniac]

did you experience depression before conceiving? did you experience suicidality prior to giving birth?

If yes, would you say that you having children was due to a lapse of judgement where you thought that your life still could get better?

Or did having children trigger your suicidality/depression.

I'm asking because idk what's wrong with me but sometimes I feel deeply guilty and selfish for not wanting children. It's probably a result of social conditioning. I don't want to succumb to the pressure.

..do you think once suicidal always suicidal?

 

[Sister of the Moon]

My depression started with postnatal depression after I had my first baby at 22 years old. The depression has never left me since, it has been a constant thorn in my side, along with anxiety and trauma. I did bring another child into the world when life was better, but couldn't even get that right. I was so ill throughout the whole pregnancy, he ended up autistic and I ended up with long term pain and fatigue, ie fibromyalgia. I have so much guilt and anxiety around him having to live in this ruthless world which has been kind to neither of us. I hope we can both make it through.