
TheTranstarEngineer
God I hate Calculus
- Mar 2, 2023
- 32
Hello everyone, this is my first post so I thought I'd just explain how I ended up here, sorry if this is more of a vent than story but there's not many places I feel I can be as open as here.
Around July last year, I made some very poor choices for eating, and ended up destroying my gut. I didn't know it for about a month, but my body couldn't process a lot of foods, so I ended up causing a lot more damage to myself then there needed to be, which ended in me breaking down in pain at the end of a family trip to Montreal. After that, I started to fix myself, eat right and heal, but at that same time, school started, and it caused my eating habits to significantly lower.
Through the first semester, I lost about 60 pounds, though the mental state it caused was much worse. I ended up in therapy, and with all this together, it's let me come to the realization that I don't see anything to live for, I don't see myself fitting in as a cog of this machine of a world. I'm lucky enough to have people around me who do genuinely care, but I feel as if their efforts are wasted at this point as I don't care. They don't understand what I do, and it seemed nobody did until I found this forum. I'm looking forward to being a part of this community, being able to help people through their journeys, and to hopefully get help through mine.
Around July last year, I made some very poor choices for eating, and ended up destroying my gut. I didn't know it for about a month, but my body couldn't process a lot of foods, so I ended up causing a lot more damage to myself then there needed to be, which ended in me breaking down in pain at the end of a family trip to Montreal. After that, I started to fix myself, eat right and heal, but at that same time, school started, and it caused my eating habits to significantly lower.
Through the first semester, I lost about 60 pounds, though the mental state it caused was much worse. I ended up in therapy, and with all this together, it's let me come to the realization that I don't see anything to live for, I don't see myself fitting in as a cog of this machine of a world. I'm lucky enough to have people around me who do genuinely care, but I feel as if their efforts are wasted at this point as I don't care. They don't understand what I do, and it seemed nobody did until I found this forum. I'm looking forward to being a part of this community, being able to help people through their journeys, and to hopefully get help through mine.