Megathread - Failed Attempts

[Kotaru Chan]

INTRODUCTION

This megathread is a space to share experiences about failed CTB attempts. The goal is to provide an honest account of what happened, how you felt at the time, and what the consequences were. Sharing these experiences can help shed light on the challenges faced and the realities of such attempts. If you feel comfortable, describe your experience following the suggested format:

1. The method used
2. What happened during and after
3. Any physical, emotional, or legal consequences

Please remember to follow community guidelines and avoid graphic details that could be triggering for others. If you need support, consider seeking professional help or reaching out to someone you trust.

 

[derekWest]

I hope that we will see very few answer to this thread.

Take care of yourself, and be prepare well !

 

[Kotaru Chan]

Espero que vejamos muito poucas respostas a este tópico.

Cuide-se e prepare-se bem!

Por que você diz isso?

 

[Halfhourdays]

What legal consequences are there in different countries for a failed attempt?

For me

1. Tylenol overdose
2. Vomited for a few days, was like I had the flu
3. Wasn't caught, though I did raise suspicions with my roommates

 

[BeijaFlor]

well...

acouple of days ago, i had the knot tied up against my neck

i felt my conciousness fading, white and black spots on my vision

my right leg began to spasm

and then...

my dog...

my daughter...

started to cry, n moan

jumping on my spasmin leg, lickin me, as if she knew what was happenin...

maybe she really knew...

i couldnt do it...

because of her...

i untied myself, i kneeled down

she licked the tears of my face

 

[sickoceanbunny]

The method used: Drinking an entire cup of mouth wash
What happened during and after: It tasted bleh like weird juice kinda mediciney it's hard to remember the exact taste now.
Any physical, emotional, or legal consequences: No consequences didn't even get sick.

For context I was pretty young when I did it, it's a Kid's berry flavoured mouth wash. I thought because it said something about calling poison control on it that I could kill myself with it if I drank enough. it's just a memorable suicide attempt.

 

[binkie]

1: Zoloft/sertraline overdose
2: was in ICU for a couple days with serotonin syndrome
3: I swear I could feel the NG tube in my nose for months every time I thought about ctb'ing afterwards. Was inpatient for about a week. I was 13 at the time and hadn't put much thought into it.

I've also attempted hanging a few times, but without many consequences. At least that I know of, I could have some brain damage but ¯⁠\⁠_⁠(⁠ツ⁠)⁠_⁠/⁠¯

 

[fallstar98]

1. Severed brachial artery
2. Failed as survival mechanism kicked in, next time I will leave phone and any way of getting help far away.
I very quickly fell unconscious and awoke in ICU several days later. They were able to save my arm but apparently this was pure luck. Significant blood loss at the time.
3. On going nerve damage. Admission to psych ward on a section but no other legal issue.

Police and paramedics were who got to me due to my stupid instinct however upon reflection it was messy and I would consider in future who finds me when I do CTB.

 

[Haematemesis]

i tried it back in 2024

method: overdosing psychiatric medicine and alcohol
2: felt sleepy and fell asleep/fainted?
3: weeks of sleepiness and mental fatigue

 

[UninformedLover]

1. Method: Overdose on Excedrin (it's a type of OTC pain reliever

2. Right before dismissal from school I took a handle of pills that I stole from a family friend's house. I remember running down the stairs inside school with my friends laughing and talking while secretly swallowing the medicine. Then pretty quickly my body felt really numb all over and eventually I could barely stand up. Then my stomach and lower sides started to hurt really bad. When I finally got home I was so scared I just ran a hot bath and laid down in the tub thinking it was my final moments on earth.

3. After a few hours I started to feel a lot better and regain the ability to stand up and walk around again. I just felt really foolish and embarrassed. Of course this was the first time I ever tried to kill myself and I was about 12/13. If I knew them what I know now I would not have wasted my time with that.

 

[L9my]

1. Tried to cut my forehead open with a stainless steel knife. It was too blunt to really do anything.
2. Got all the way up, finally ready to jump. No access to the balcony.
SI probably would've stopped me anyway.

 

[wiggy]

1. Severed brachial artery
2. Failed as survival mechanism kicked in, next time I will leave phone and any way of getting help far away.
I very quickly fell unconscious and awoke in ICU several days later. They were able to save my arm but apparently this was pure luck. Significant blood loss at the time.
3. On going nerve damage. Admission to psych ward on a section but no other legal issue.

Police and paramedics were who got to me due to my stupid instinct however upon reflection it was messy and I would consider in future who finds me when I do CTB.

You're one tough customer to have been able to not only execute it but survive a severed artery. Hope you're doing better

 

[ladylazarus4]

1. Overdose of dramamine. Did not count- estimated 1500 mg or 30 mg/kg.
2. Felt dizziness after 10-15 minutes. Intense brain fog after 1.5 hours. After that, I can't remember- I only know what I've been told. Hallucinations, agitation (to the point of needing to be restrained). I woke up 24ish hours later.
3. No lasting effects.

 

[EmptyBottle]

1. Wrapped sock around neck a bit tight (skipping steps from a 'night night' method)
2. Besides mild neck soreness, nothing happened, so removed sock a few mins later
3. No (known) lasting effects.

 

[Pale_Rider]

Drank 345 mgs of methadone. Took maybe 8 minutes to lose consciousness. I was discovered, and revived.

 

[sleepy_redcar]

1. Used a dog slip lead that got tighter as more pressure was put on it for partial hanging
2. Took a longer time than expected, I was there for at least 20 minutes with active conscious, over time sounds faded away, my fingers felt tingly, my legs, I was incredibly under the substance , used quite a bit of padding because I knew how bad thin chords felt from experiment, and it felt a bit euphoric losing consciousness, eventually did pass out, but got awaken minutes later by my partner after what he says minutes of shaking me thinking I was gone and about to call emergency services, I will say when I got awaken I was super lost, and when he asked me simple questions it took a lot of brainpower to speak or think since I kind of shut everything down and then got awaken, I was back to "normal" after about 20 minutes of him interacting with me
3. None physical since I used padding and the marks eventually faded after a couple of days, i'm not sure if I suffered any kind of neurological damage since I don't plan on going to the doctor and getting it checked, wore turtlenecks and went about my day, biggest thing was my partner seeing me in that state, we're still together, but he tells me every so often he's scared he'll find me again not in time, or too far gone for my brain to recover

 

[kamyzyak]

Drank 345 mgs of methadone. Took maybe 8 minutes to lose consciousness. I was discovered, and revived.

Hi! I consider methadone OD as my method. I'd be glad if you could answer a few questions :)
1. Have you experienced any unpleasant effects? From personal experience, some drugs can turn from euphoric to EXTREMELY unpleasant if they have been taken in a large enough dose.
2. Was there nausea/vomiting?
3. Have you taken anything other than methadone, like antiemetics/alcohol/benzos?

 

[Darkover]

back in 2018 i overdose on olanzapine 300mg and amitriptyline 100mg and zopiclone 100mg combined together was mixed in a glass of water
i was completely unconscious within 5 mins my mum found me and she rang an ambulance when they arrived i was in respiratory arrest
i was taken to the hospital to the intensive care unit where i was put on a ventilator i icu for two whole days completely unconscious
i was later taken straight to the mental hospital and put on a section 3 and stayed there for 6 months
there was no pain and i was completely fine afterwards no health complications

 

[Pale_Rider]

Hi! I consider methadone OD as my method. I'd be glad if you could answer a few questions :)
1. Have you experienced any unpleasant effects? From personal experience, some drugs can turn from euphoric to EXTREMELY unpleasant if they have been taken in a large enough dose.
2. Was there nausea/vomiting?
3. Have you taken anything other than methadone, like antiemetics/alcohol/benzos?

If you have never done opiates before there is a high likehood you would become nauseous from them the first time, but if you have access to methadone in the required dosage legally that's probably not going to be am issue. For me opiates always make me feel good. It's the withdrawal that is hard. Particularly with methadone as it took at least a year it seems like. That day I had a cup of coffee, and drank my three bottles of meth. Each one 115 MG. Yes I started out on heroin when I was younger. At the time of this attempt I occasionally did cocain, and majuana, but on the day of the attempt nothing extra was consumed. Didn't even eat breakfast. I was foiled because I was being watched, and they were able to reverse / revive me in a timely matter.

 

[heisenberg]

i tried to od like 6 years ago on whatever prescription my stepbrother was taking at the time. i don't remember them, but mostly antipsychotics. clonidine was one of them. i think i took around 100 pills in total. my heart was racing fast, i was losing consciousness. i had a tumblr account at the time and posted what i'd done. this one lady started messaging me, begging me to tell my parents, and shared a picture of her brother when he attempted suicide. he was hooked up to a breathing machine and in critical condition. i'll never forget that picture.
i ended up telling my mom and as soon as i got into the hospital, i lost consciousness. i don't remember the next few days after that. i spent 1 week in the ICU and 2 weeks in inpatient psych after. no lasting symptoms and i was fine after i got out the ICU.

 

[weallhaveourghosts]

1. The method used
2. What happened during and after
3. Any physical, emotional, or legal consequences

Phew okay well from the first to present day okay lets go

Attempted to drink bleach. Really only drank a little bit.
Nothing happened
No consequences

Tylenol overdose (with alcohol mixed in)
It was painful, threw up a decent amount
Ended up losing friends and ended up in a psych ward for almost two weeks

(Tbh tried the tylenol thing a lot)

Tried to cut my neck????
IDK even know why??
Mostly ended up with scarring

Came close to jumping off a bridge. Like was literally looking into the water below.
Couldnt do it and called my at the time roommate
Psych hold (which couldve ended up as a full time commitment but thankfully didnt)

Lots of cutting different directions
Nothing cause never went deep enough
Nothing

Jumped into a river which was freezing hoping to get carried away and die of hypothermia
River wasn't deep enough
Ended up getting myself out and going to my car and called someone and ended up in the hospital then a psych hold (of which I got out and was going to attempt something again and ended up at another hospital and with a lawyer which idk I am new to this state so not sure what that meant but I just know I got out)

Oh attempted to overdose on unisom and alcohol
Felt my body was super heavy and could barely get up without holding onto walls
Threw up what looked like blood and then slept (no one knew I did that so no psych hold)