Job Search is pushing me over the edge

[nothingbutafailure]

I've been unemployed for about 4 months and haven't found anything good.

At this rate my car will probably get repossessed, which will be a nightmare and cripple me economically.

Submitted 50 applications today and the more I do it the more demoralized I feel and the more intrusive suicidal thoughts I have.

I fucking hate being treated like an autistic savant and doll in real life and being a totally unqualified loser professionally. The dissonance is killing me.

Wish I had a real gun and not just pills.

 

[opheliaoveragain]

BIG RELATE. I've been looking since April and it's absolutely killing me inside. I've sent HUNDREDS. Scams are rampant as are jobs that require you to put out money to obtain a license for a fully commissioned job. SIGH.

Sending you hugs OP, here if you wanna talk.

 

[Edu Ardanuy]

I've been unemployed for about 4 months and haven't found anything good.

At this rate my car will probably get repossessed, which will be a nightmare and cripple me economically.

Submitted 50 applications today and the more I do it the more demoralized I feel and the more intrusive suicidal thoughts I have.

I fucking hate being treated like an autistic savant and doll in real life and being a totally unqualified loser professionally. The dissonance is killing me.

Wish I had a real gun and not just pills.

I know how it is, trust me. It sucks big time.

 

[theboy]

Ah!
The economy is tough but maybe you can offer your services according to your skills.
editing, videos, selling stuff...?

 

[bluejorvik]

Not exactly the same situation - I have enjoyed my career/job for years but these past few months it's become unbearable. Seems like when you most want to get something you just get no luck. I've applied for other jobs and the rejections are totally fucking me. People say work isn't something to base your life around but it really hurts when it's all going wrong. I feel you and hope you will find something soon

 

[nothingbutafailure]

What makes it so much worse is that while I was working my old job, I had multiple job offers that paid much better than what I was getting. However, I stayed because I appreciated the idea that they were investing in me and training me, and I was giving myself time to grow and heal from my trauma. Now I'm arguably even more skilled than ever but can't even land an interview, at the same places, when I have more experience to show. Everyone is telling me the market sucks right now but all I'm feeling is that I suck and going to end myself by the end of January.

 

[Rev346]

Job searching sucks. You're expected to kiss ass and know everything about the company you're applying with and they don't even have to acknowledge whether they receive your application, let alone contact you. Best bet is to ask friends if they know of anything or go through any associations you may be a part of. Good luck!

 

[yowai]

I was looking for something that would work with my difficulties (autism lol) and not require experience since I've only worked once as a cashier + didn't get specific education after finishing high school, and it makes me feel like such a loser lol, like if there isn't anything that I'd be capable of doing for money and be functioning in society then how am I supposed to live this life

 

[nothingbutafailure]

Yay, more bad news. I did not win my unemployment appeal, which means no fucking money.

 

[8leveloquenfrn4evr8]

The planet is going to explode soon...finally (fingers crossed!).

 

[nothingbutafailure]

Guess what? Unfortunately, I'm still alive and can't get a job.

I had multiple 6 figure jobs try to recruit me and dip.

By the way, I was groomed online and have witnessed someone socially embedded in child-fucker groups find great jobs in tech. Was it a transactional pedophile game to get under my skin? Probably. Does it make me feel fucking awful about humanity and not want to be here? Yeah.

Speaking of this topic, I wrote an entire goddamn rant a week ago when I was bonkers depressed:

1. Elon Musk descended from a man who was a cryptographer for Egyptian military intelligence.
2. Musk himself was Canadian, not American. He shouldn't be anywhere near government roles.
3. Musk is clearly a Nazi sympathizer and it's plausible that his military family bought wholesale into Nazi ideology. Egypt WAS loosely allied with Nazi Germany.
4. Musk attempted to join the "babyfur" community but was removed yet has the audacity to lambast his transgender daughter. So think: "Being trans is degenerate but being interested in furry children doing lewd acts is not repugnant, but curious!" By the way, Musk tweeted he was "furcurious" once.
5. We are allowing a furry PDF FILE (Elon Musk) control the government.
6. We are allowing a friend of a convicted PDF FILE trafficker (Jeffery Epstein) become president (Donald Trump).
7. Donald Trump (PDF FILE) and Elon Musk (PDF FILE) are friends, meaning we are giving the reigns of the USA over to a PDF FILE mafia.
8. The Nazis destroyed THE sexological research institution and persecuted transgender and transsexual people while promoting the abuse of children.
9. Reports and testimonies from survivors and witnesses describe cases of sexual abuse, exploitation, and assault within the Hitler Youth and other Nazi organizations. Including: 1. Forced prostitution: Some young girls, often from marginalized groups, were forced into prostitution in brothels or "soldier's houses" (Soldatenhäuser).2. Sexual exploitation: Nazi officials, including those in positions of authority within the Hitler Youth, exploited and abused children and youth. 3. Rituals and initiations: Some reports describe initiation rituals within the Hitler Youth that involved physical and sexual abuse.
10. X/Twitter/Mastodon/Patreon have are platforms where users are allowed to advertise, buy and sell CSAM - especially drawings and 3D or CGI drawings and AI generated content - yet the "conservative right" has not lifted a finger to address this degeneracy, preferring to scapegoat and call trans people degenerate, instead. No one has called for the CEOs of the four social media sites I listed to be locked up for effectively running CP sites.
11. No one, absolutely no one famous or in the news, has bothered to make the connection between AI in big tech and the use of AI for the production of "lifelike" CP, but it would be utterly stupid not to believe THAT connection is real. Intelligent people used AI to generate CP, they are out there and real.
12. OpenAI has NEVER shared its data set token size. St. Louis is a human trafficking hub. The CEO of OpenAI (Sam Altman) is a gay man from St. Louis, who has never been seen in any St. Louis gay bars. The FBI has stated that St. Louis is one of the top 20 trafficking destinations in the country, because of highway 70 and 44.
13. Even if some people in these social circles (Elon, Musk, Sam) are NOT PDF FILES it would not take away the fact that people weaponize youth to subjugate others and create what are functionally blackmailed modern slaves, henchmen, henchwomen and minions. Until THE PEOPLE RECOGNIZE this power nothing will ever get better.

 

[ecstasy]

im so sorry :c the state of the world rn is not fun, i wish you luck in this horrible job market and in society in general

 

[FadingSnowFake]

I'm with you, honestly don't know anymore. My last $100 is reserved for SN, and there's not much time left to get there.

 

[opheliaoveragain]

I haven't found shit either. and now they're sweeping the homeless in my city to essentially worse conditions. it's scary and I don't want to be here anymore.

 

[NonEssential]

I couldn't find any work at all so I went back to school. I tell others that I'll be able to find work thanks to the skills I'll learn there. In reality I'm certain I won't, because I'm incompetent and dumb, so I'll surely just ctb after it, if not even earlier.