amerie
goofball
- Oct 6, 2024
- 221
I think I might actually be cooked, my mental health is starting to spiral in ways that it never has before, and trust me I've gone through it. I've begun the same cycle as last year where I just sit in my bed for hours staring at the ceiling in a paralysis like state, unable to do anything and I'm just overthinking about how much I don't deserve to be here. I am 100% convinced that every single hardship I've experienced is my fault and could've been avoided if I tried harder. And now for the stupid mistakes I made in my youth I am now forever suicidal, I despise myself so much and I just want to tear off my skin and exit from the body I'm trapped in so badly. I've never felt so alone in my life and the only thing that brings me comfort is the thought of finally ending it all.
Fucking shit I just want to die so badly, every single day I'm reminded that my existence is a mistake and I feel so out of place in this fucked up world. I don't understand what the fuck is wrong with me and I just wish I was normal so bad. I can't stop binge eating and doomscrolling and none of this is bringing me happiness. I don't have any true goals in life, everything I want is just for the purpose of outside validation. My only true goal in life is to be fucking done with it but god dammit pro lifers censored the fuck out of any resource available to quickly end our shit and now I have to wait until I'm stable in life and then I can kill myself. FUCK. Let me die let me die let me die let me die let me die let me die let me die.
It's all my fault and I am a burden to everyone around me, there is no benefit to associating with me, I just drag everyone down and I exist to leech off the hard work of others. How much will it take for people to realize that some people just don't add value to this world? That some of us cause issues and are consumers rather than contributors?? Give us a choice please.
Fucking shit I just want to die so badly, every single day I'm reminded that my existence is a mistake and I feel so out of place in this fucked up world. I don't understand what the fuck is wrong with me and I just wish I was normal so bad. I can't stop binge eating and doomscrolling and none of this is bringing me happiness. I don't have any true goals in life, everything I want is just for the purpose of outside validation. My only true goal in life is to be fucking done with it but god dammit pro lifers censored the fuck out of any resource available to quickly end our shit and now I have to wait until I'm stable in life and then I can kill myself. FUCK. Let me die let me die let me die let me die let me die let me die let me die.
It's all my fault and I am a burden to everyone around me, there is no benefit to associating with me, I just drag everyone down and I exist to leech off the hard work of others. How much will it take for people to realize that some people just don't add value to this world? That some of us cause issues and are consumers rather than contributors?? Give us a choice please.
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