is there anything that keeps you alive?

[darkwater]

It always seemed to me that I was inferior no matter what I did. I was always worse than everyone else. But in the meantime I have understood one thing - maybe you have to invest twice as much time to reach the goal. I now understand English quite well but that is due to Youtube and newspapers. Speaking is still a challenge. But before I die I want to understand at least some Japanese and be able to play guitar.

 

[olkf]

Waiting for my SN

 

[PreussenBlueJay]

You should get a Japanese flash card app on your phone and study those whenever you have a few minutes. Small repeated lessons build pretty quickly. If you have a big overarching goal like that you can really pass the time quickly and building on something over and over is pretty fulfilling.

 

[MelancholyMagic]

At the risk of sounding cliche, family. They are the primary reason I haven't ctb yet. At least, that's what I tell myself. Perhaps if I didn't have that excuse, the lizard brain would churn something else out.
I am very much concerned for my family's welfare, and I do not want them to deal with my death. I may still ctb though - will have to see. But for now, that's pretty much it.

 

[summers]

ATP in my cells. Pretty much anything that is alive is because of this compound.

Adenosine triphosphate - Wikipedia

en.wikipedia.org

 

[Teas]

idk but my hobbies are the only things keeping my self together

 

[ThriveOrDie]

This site is the only thing keeping me alive right now. Working helps if I can have a decent job but I haven't had that in over a year. I raised 2 litters of kittens last year. That kept me going just barely.

 

[Sherri]

My bf, my meds, my closest friends for now . But will always feel suicidal, it's a day by day for me.

 

[Sanva]

i know that feeling. right now i'm just curious how i'll do on my exams. I'll probably fuck them up but I want to try, so I'm going to stay around until that's done. after that, i don't know.

 

[fatefulstillness]

A story I'm writing, college, my partner, this forum, a wild dove I befriended that visits me every day. They place some distance between today and the inevitable, but I often doubt if I'll be able to stay for as long as I'm supposed to, or if one day I'll just take the chance. It's rough.

 

[FuneralCry]

I am only still alive because it is difficult to leave this world, there is no reason for me to stay and there is nothing that would ever make me want to live.

 

[Hirokami]

Interestingly enough, I want to learn Japanese as well. Or rather, more Japanese. I'm at an N3 level, though getting to N1 would be ideal. I just have to motivate myself to get back into it.

Aside from that my mother, two cats, and academic goals are keeping me here long-term.

 

[neitherherenorthere]

I realized recently that emotional lability is one of the major factors keeping me from dying. When I want to kill myself really badly I'm too tired to do anything about it, and when I have energy I don't feel bad enough to actively prep.

 

[messy]

Guilt and failure.

 

[Dr Iron Arc]

Media such as the movies/games/shows I'm excited for though I've already gone into extensive detail as to which ones I need to wait for and which ones I don't have to stay alive for as much.

Also the slim one in fourteen million, six hundred five chance that someone who wants to be my gf could show up within the next few months.

 

[Feeding Pigeons]

Fear and repeated failure to fast for a day straight.

 

[Mixo]

The only thing that keeps me alive is the fact that I have unfinished avenues for solutions. I have specific plans to eliminate the debilitating illnesses that are weighing me down. Once I go through these different solutions, if I'm still ill, then I would say I don't have much reason left to live.

 

[D&D]

Failure, thus far, to die. Working on it.

Memories. Hoping that the principle 'we remember what we must know' means once we done 'knowing/learning' here, we are ready to start again only this time knowing.

Writing. I am least sure about this one. While I write, I know that every story needs a reader(s). There is no story if there is no one to hear it. Stories, like people, come into being only if/when heard. Otherwise, as I keep on telling myself, they are rumblings of a deranged lunatic! Such as yours truly.

 

[avoid_slow_death]

Breathing?

 

[Heartaches]

I feel my biggest reason is that I can't accept death, it lingers on my mind but I can't really understand it, it scares me to an extent.

Other reasons are my cat, the few close friends I have, music, drawing, youtube/twitch, books and smaller passtimes. It's still extremely painful and tiring to get through each day but at least I have some comfort.
​

i know that feeling. right now i'm just curious how i'll do on my exams. I'll probably fuck them up but I want to try, so I'm going to stay around until that's done. after that, i don't know.

I wish you luck

 

[WrongPlaceWrongTime]

Family mainly. No reason to drag on if I were alone.

As for learning a language, do you use Duolingo? It might help if you continuously practice a little everyday, that's what I do for German.

 

[Pallf]

Uh, family and video games I guess. And with all the people I've met to help me get through the bad times, I'd rather not hurt em.
I also need to know if Sonic Frontier(s) is good. I'm hyped for that.

 

[Seiko]

Knowing how to do it and knowing it's always available. Also, alcohol.