I will hang myself soon

[Terrible_Life_99]

Hello everyone,
I'm new here, but I read a lot here before I created this account.
My life has been terrible, I had parents who would always argue with each other, they were terrible and made my life life hell on earth. I'm 25 years old and my life was terrible. I was lonely all the time, every "friendship" was lost 5 years ago, since then I've no friends.
I want to hang myself since March 2024. I've prepared everything since that time, I have a good wood beam at home, I have the rope! I know the knots I'll use, a poachers knot for the noose and a constrictor knot for the beam.
My birthday is in September, but I'll hang myself in July/August 2025.
I write this because I have no one to talk to and I hope here I'll have the possibility to talk freely with people who won't call the cops or judge me.


Excuse me please for my English. :)

 

[opheliaoveragain]

Welcome to the forum. We're here for you for as long as you are with us <3

 

[cemeteryismyhome]

Welcome! Your English is excellent.

 

[lifeisadream]

Hello, you can talk openly here without fear of judgement & you can share whatever you feel comfortable with. We're here to listen.

 

[synxdearee]

if this is your final decision, make sure all your affairs are in order, write your goodbyes, live the remainder of the time youve chosen happily. finish that game you started. travel somewhere youve always wanted to see.

 

[Terrible_Life_99]

I could cry right now because I feel so welcomed by you all. Before Sasu I had no one to talk to freely about my suicide . I felt like a prisoner. If I told my parents or other family members or that psychologist who I talked to in Oktober 2024 the last time about my plan to hang myself, I'd be in some terrible inhumane psychiatry right now, thank you all really for listening and helping me :)!!
So I planned everything about my suicide , I had a terrible life. My life was empty. There were no real friends or a relationship and I'm really sad about that, this is one of the things I regret a lot because even tho everything will end soon I still wish so much that I've seen all those experiences like how does it feel to have a girlfriend and love or how does real friendship feel like….unfortunately I'll never have these feelings, I'll never know how a normal life feels like…

Welcome to the forum. We're here for you for as long as you are with us <3

I'll always be with you all.
You all here are the only people who will understand me.

 

[lifeisadream]

So sorry life hasn't been kind to you & you feel empty. It's also hard when trying to explain exactly how you feel to others in real life for fear of the consequences. You can stay here with us for as long as you want.

 

[Terrible_Life_99]

I will die soon. I'll hang myself. I have a wood beam at home that I've tested many times. I'm 25 years old male and I live with my parents. At a Friday I'll have the home for me, I'll hang myself at 6:30PM , the first people who will arrive at 8pm will be my mother and my little brother who is 11 years and neurological ill, they won't be able to open the door because I'll barricade it, so they'll call the cops. I'll be dead when they enter the house. I'll leave a notice directly at the door when they'll open they'll see. In that notice I'll beg my mom to please tell my little brother to play in his room so that he'll never see me hanged.

So sorry life hasn't been kind to you & you feel empty. It's also hard when trying to explain exactly how you feel to others in real life for fear of the consequences. You can stay here with us for as long as you want.

Thank you so much

 

[spero_meliora]

I'm so sorry life has brought you to this - I hope you find peace.

for as long as you are with us here at SaSu, you have a community who understands and is more than happy to listen to you.

 

[Terrible_Life_99]

I will die soon. Nobody will ever know how much I've suffered with his toxic family! I wish I would have been adopted to a nice stable family who would have thought me about this cruel world, but no, I had to be tortured by this terrible family. The made my life a hell and I'm so happy that soon my life will end. Who knows what will come after death? Nobody, BUT one thing is clear, when I'm dead, I'll never have to live this life with all its suffering, I'll never have to see my father again, I'll never have to feel like a an useful peace of shit…nobody will be able to revive my shit life.

 

[darksouls]

welcome to sasu
I am so sorry you are suffering so much
that all sounds very cruel
with all my heart I wish you the best
I hope you find relief from suffering

 

[Terrible_Life_99]

welcome to sasu
I am so sorry you are suffering so much
that all sounds very cruel
with all my heart I wish you the best
I hope you find relief from suffering

Thank you so much

 

[Ch4in3dcr0w]

Welcome to sasu. Im sorry it had come to this to end your suffering from this hell of a life. I wish u all the best and hope u will find relief u are looking for. Much love and good luck

 

[tanshakti]

I will die soon. Nobody will ever know how much I've suffered with his toxic family! I wish I would have been adopted to a nice stable family who would have thought me about this cruel world, but no, I had to be tortured by this terrible family. The made my life a hell and I'm so happy that soon my life will end. Who knows what will come after death? Nobody, BUT one thing is clear, when I'm dead, I'll never have to live this life with all its suffering, I'll never have to see my father again, I'll never have to feel like a an useful peace of shit…nobody will be able to revive my shit life.

This is your decision, but looks like you care about your mom and lil bro and you are still young for a chance to experience what you want to experience. I fear the house will be left haunted and you might also get interrupted by change of plans of your family neighbor friend etc... have you considered a different location to avoid the bad effects of the after math. Also, why not slip knot (noose) as recommended by experts here

 

[Praestat_Mori]

Welcome to SaSu!

We're here for you

 

[Terrible_Life_99]

This is your decision, but looks like you care about your mom and lil bro and you are still young for a chance to experience what you want to experience. I fear the house will be left haunted and you might also get interrupted by change of plans of your family neighbor friend etc... have you considered a different location to avoid the bad effects of the after math. Also, why not slip knot (noose) as recommended by experts here

Hey, my whole family always leaves the house at Fridays. All of them from 5:15pm until 8pm. At this time I'll barricade there house door with a door barricade stab. The reason why I use the poachers knot is because I just can't trust the noose knot even though so many people recommend it here. I think its way to unsafe for a full suspended hanging, thats why I'll use the poachers knot that that has two convolutions.

Welcome to SaSu!

We're here for you

And I'm so thankful! Before this Forum I could only talk to the suicide hotline which was just terrible! Some of those people are simply just disgusting! Instead of listening and helping they'll start to discuss with you and they'll even somehow bully you by telling you that your reasons for suicide a unjustified etc.

 

[Gustav Hartmann]

It sounds like you have nothing to loose, so you are really free. You are old enough to leave your home and experienc real life without your family. Take your rope with you, you will always find a place to hang yourself in case life is unbearable.