Venting I want to just not exist

[charlie_pollard]

I don't really want to die, but it feels like it might be the only option. I don't want to go outside or talk to people. I feel like a foreigner to the people around me. I just don't understand them, and I don't want to have to put in the effort and exhaust myself to intergrate myself into a society that I hate. I just want to never leave the house, but I can't affort my own house, because I need to go outside for work. I just don't want to do anything. I can't enjoy anything anymore.