Crow_88
Experienced
- Dec 30, 2024
- 277
I don't deserve to be alive. For the burden I am. For the things I've done. This forum is about the only place I even come close to telling the whole story. I, over a period of years and unbelievably bad decisions have destroyed my life and completely lost my humanity. People who knew me don't even talk to me now. And I am regretful, but there's nothing I can do to change any of it. It's all over. This living situation is untenable.
(Just going to add onto this one instead of making another post)
I know that I am just done. Whatever delusion ego state of twisted self identity I was living under has completely failed. My entire life I had a vision of myself that I believed in completely. So completely that I managed to fake it for nearly my entire life. Knew when to cut and run and told myself it was a victory. Hopping from town to town. And now it's all failed. And I am left with absolutely nothing. The lie is exposed and what is left is hollowed out fear.
And an absolute desire to just sit down and die. I used to think I'd be rich and famous. Well, I certainly got myself noticed with my nonsense antics. But bad fame and no money - poverty.
(Just going to add onto this one instead of making another post)
I know that I am just done. Whatever delusion ego state of twisted self identity I was living under has completely failed. My entire life I had a vision of myself that I believed in completely. So completely that I managed to fake it for nearly my entire life. Knew when to cut and run and told myself it was a victory. Hopping from town to town. And now it's all failed. And I am left with absolutely nothing. The lie is exposed and what is left is hollowed out fear.
And an absolute desire to just sit down and die. I used to think I'd be rich and famous. Well, I certainly got myself noticed with my nonsense antics. But bad fame and no money - poverty.
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