I could really use some advice

[Panna]

My mother is essentially psychotic, I love her, and I know she loves me but at the same time her personality is going to ultimately destroy the family one of these days and I don't know how to handle it. I could give a list of things she has done over the years but last night alone she spent three hours blaming me for a piece of clothing being placed in the trash (never touched it). For context she has a hoarder personality and so she has walls of stuff that she will never use, (luckily this is contained to the upstairs). She comes downstairs and starts tossing things on my floor I cleaned, throwing things at me, until I couldn't take it anymore. It got to the point that my brother came downstairs, she hit him, and he ended up flipping her. Essentially her personality is very violent, if you dare to have thoughts different than hers, or you don't believe in god in any capacity, she will hit and she will harrass and there's nowhere to run. I keep trying to drown it out with my anime and my games because I can't run, I'm far too scared to go anywhere, I know I wouldn't last since I'm afraid of making others mad, and I'm scared to inconvience anyone with my problems. If I left then she'd go after my other brother who also hates god, has cerebral palsy and so hes physically fragile who can't fight back. It just feels like I'm trapped and honestly I don't even know why I'm posting this.

 

[GoneGoneGone]

I'm sorry about what you and your brother are going through. How old are you? Is she diagnosed, is she medicated?

 

[Panna]

I'm sorry about what you and your brother are going through. How old are you? Is she diagnosed, is she medicated?

I'm 28 in college (I know pathetic), I attend online because I can't handle being out there, I tried to but it felt so much worse there than being here. No she's not medicated, she feels that theres nothing wrong with her, and refuses to change her personality. That's the problem. All of my brothers except for one, live here because we have the same kind of fear. If I tried to get her diagnosed or medicated, she would use her words to press buttons and get me to mentally break down, or twist them so that I look like the villain.

 

[GoneGoneGone]

I would try to minimize the amount of time or interactions that you have with her. Even if you're in the anime and games zone, it might be more beneficial maybe after the Covid restrictions are over to just try to spend as much time outside as possible. Do you have other close family members that you could discuss the situation with?

I'm 28 in college (I know pathetic)

It's not pathetic at all! It's an accomplishment!

 

[Panna]

I would try to minimize the amount of time or interactions that you have with her. Even if you're in the anime and games zone, it might be more beneficial maybe after the Covid restrictions are over to just try to spend as much time outside as possible. Do you have other close family members that you could discuss the situation with?

No, the only family we have live all the way on the other side of the united states, and we currently reside in the country with nowhere to go to avoid her. Luckily I stay in the basement and her room is upstairs. Though she gets around this by calling my phone repeatedly until I pick up, or yelling at the others until theyre so stressed out they come downstairs to chase me up there since shes pretty obese.

 

[GoneGoneGone]

I'm 28 in college (I know pathetic), I attend online because I can't handle being out there, I tried to but it felt so much worse there than being here. No she's not medicated, she feels that theres nothing wrong with her, and refuses to change her personality. That's the problem. All of my brothers except for one, live here because we have the same kind of fear. If I tried to get her diagnosed or medicated, she would use her words to press buttons and get me to mentally break down, or twist them so that I look like the villain.

Maybe you could have a chat with your brothers to get her psych help. It's not okay that she is physically and emotionally violent.

or yelling at the others until theyre so stressed out they come downstairs to chase me up there since shes pretty obese.

Who are the others? Sorry, just trying to understand

 

[Panna]

Who are the others? Sorry, just trying to understand

My brothers or my dad, she doesn't have any qualms with using whatever she has available to her to ger her way. thanks for responding to this, honestly I feel pretty embarressed, I just needed to vent and I really appreciate your response, I'll try talking to my dad and my brothers.