Venting How to live when you cant live for yourself?

[Pure Vanilla]

The only "Hobby" I have is talking to one sole person yet that person, no matter who it is, will always grow sick of me or stop putting in any effort to talk to me every time, how do you live for yourself? Theres no joy or fulfillment in it

 

[Forever Sleep]

I don't really live for myself. I live so that my suicide doesn't hurt my Dad. Beyond that, I just try to get through as best I can. I also feel I have to work to support myself. I've tried to get a job I find the most tolerable. The rest is bribery and distraction. I bribe myself through with food and entertainment.