How do I "smile because it happened?"

[freecoffee]

It hurts to recall what I'd call the "best moments" of my life while knowing I'll never live through them again, that I'll never meet those same people or experience the happiness those moments made me feel, and this thought process always leads to my current life feeling more disappointing, leaving me worried that even if I feel happy in the future, that happiness will pale in comparison. But for some strange reason, the majority of the pain these happy memories comes from the simple fact that they're over, and I really want to live through them again.

I know we're supposed to cherish happy memories, reminiscing is meant to be something enjoyable after all, but I can't really figure out how I'm supposed to. What exactly am I missing?

 

[thx1138]

This is a great thoughtful question. How do we enjoy happy memories without the pain? Maybe it's not possible. Most things in life come with both good and bad sides. For me, it's been more beneficial to focus on the future instead of the past. Maybe it's never going to be as good as we had it before. But that shouldn't stop you from living your life in the here and now. I think you should be less hard on yourself and not to judge your thoughts and reactions to the past. Nobody has a "perfect" way of seeing the world, we all have challenges. What matters is what we do with them in the present. If it hurts to remember the past, I would try not to dwell on it too much. Easier said than done, obviously...