My father's partner allowed me to live in her apartment "temporarily". This "temporarily" has been lasting for 8 years already. In a sense, I'm still dependent on my father because this apartment belongs to his partner. Even though I pay for a rent and bills and I have a job, I feel like I still don't live on my own. Conditions here are awful and I feel miserable here. Besides, he said it two times already that I should move out. We don't talk to each other and I also have traumas from childhood because of him.
At the same time, I can't go back to my childhood home and live with my mother because she is an alcoholic living with her alcoholic boyfriend and they were the main reason I moved out of there in the first place. Besides, there's no space for me there.
It doesn't help that I have mental and physical conditions which made me a really weak person. Because of that, it holds me back and I'm scared to "go out into the world". I'm scared that one day I will have no power (either physical or mental) to go to my job and then I will not be able to pay a rent.
I'm also scared of renting a room and living with strangers. I was the only child with my own room for most of my childhood. Then when I moved here 8 years ago, I got used to living alone. Suddenly I would have to rent a room and live with strangers in the house.
It also doesn't help that I'm prone to taking long breaks every time I decide to quit a job. The breaks last about 3 months so I can recharge my batteries. During this period I live off of my savings. But it's easier to do that living here, where I didn't sign any actual legal document/contract. If I sign a room rental agreement, then I won't have a gut to quit my job just like that, which will make it even worse and rise chances of a job burnout, sooner or later.
How did you guys got a courage and were able to move out and rent a room and live with strangers? With these conditions that we have...
At the same time, I can't go back to my childhood home and live with my mother because she is an alcoholic living with her alcoholic boyfriend and they were the main reason I moved out of there in the first place. Besides, there's no space for me there.
It doesn't help that I have mental and physical conditions which made me a really weak person. Because of that, it holds me back and I'm scared to "go out into the world". I'm scared that one day I will have no power (either physical or mental) to go to my job and then I will not be able to pay a rent.
I'm also scared of renting a room and living with strangers. I was the only child with my own room for most of my childhood. Then when I moved here 8 years ago, I got used to living alone. Suddenly I would have to rent a room and live with strangers in the house.
It also doesn't help that I'm prone to taking long breaks every time I decide to quit a job. The breaks last about 3 months so I can recharge my batteries. During this period I live off of my savings. But it's easier to do that living here, where I didn't sign any actual legal document/contract. If I sign a room rental agreement, then I won't have a gut to quit my job just like that, which will make it even worse and rise chances of a job burnout, sooner or later.
How did you guys got a courage and were able to move out and rent a room and live with strangers? With these conditions that we have...
