NSFW He's gone, forever. (Part 2)

[lovelove416]

Read the previous thread for context...I contacted my friends and everyone involved to get his user on a different site. But they were uncomfortable with what happened and claimed they didn't have it or that his account was deleted. The account I contacted him with originally was also deleted and they wouldn't give me the server we were on for various reasons. I had a sliver of hope that I could see him again. Demolished.

My love life is horrible and has never been great. I don't believe I'll ever have a chance with anyone who isn't him. I'm talked about sexually but I'm never an actual option. Just the girl you joke about dating or talk to for a couple bucks to make your friends laugh. At least he'd be willing to have a relationship with me.

I want to find someone like him, but don't know how. As horrible as it is I crave a piece of shit that treats me like shit but at least has the decency to have an actual relationship, I don't care if that relationships abusive. I want the obsession and undying willingness to continue to stay with me. Some people just aren't made for anyone "better" or "good" normal relationships. But I still think that guy's something that I won't find again.

 

[U. A.]

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[violetforever]

I contacted my friends and everyone involved to get his user on a different site. But they were uncomfortable with what happened and claimed they didn't have it or that his account was deleted. The account I contacted him with originally was also deleted and they wouldn't give me the server we were on for various reasons.

thank god they are looking out for you. i'm not trying to hurt your feelings but this guy was really creepy. he talked to you when you were younger than him so that's probably what he is up to now with another poor girl if he's still at it.

I'm talked about sexually but I'm never an actual option. Just the girl you joke about dating or talk to for a couple bucks to make your friends laugh. At least he'd be willing to have a relationship with me.

your relationship with him was far more cruel than what you just described. obviously don't accept any of those behaviors from guys though.

I want to find someone like him, but don't know how. As horrible as it is I crave a piece of shit that treats me like shit but at least has the decency to have an actual relationship, I don't care if that relationships abusive. I want the obsession and undying willingness to continue to stay with me. Some people just aren't made for anyone "better" or "good" normal relationships. But I still think that guy's something that I won't find again.

i have the same mindset but not as extreme. i don't wish for abuse for myself after being around it my entire life but "normal" relationships would do nothing for me. i've never seen a healthy relationship so how could i ever desire and see myself apart of one? it would bore me out of my mind to be with someone near my age and someone who didn't have at least some suffering and problems similar to my own or members of my family. i find people with stability uninteresting. this is a very broken way of thinking like yours so i don't have advice about it. it's either stay alone or put myself into a chaotic relationship and i choose to be alone. mostly because i doubt i could ever love or care for another man a crazy amount again. but i really have outgrown those "thrill of risk and danger" relationships. i hope you come to a realization like this for yourself it's a false influenced way of thinking when you say some people just aren't made for good relationships/partners. that just perpetuates the cycle of abuse.