Has anyone dealt with obsession/lovesickness?

[angelsrevolver]

Hi, this is my first post on this website. I hope you guys will accept me. I apologise if I mistagged something or made any mistakes.
I've had a 6 year long obsession with my best friend. As a result, I have resorted to stalking, threats, and full-on emotional abuse. We have been on and off due to this. I am distant and avoidant, but he happens to be an exception to my general demeanour. I am aware that I am a horrible person, nonetheless, I just wanted to see if there is anyone that might resonate with this.

 

[enduringwinter]

Yeah I get it.

5-6 years is the mark where I tend to ghost them forever tbh. I've heard about the seven year itch but it's the 5-6 years ghost for me lol.

It felt great the first time and I think my self esteem improved permanently from that, the subsequent ones werent worth it tho.

 

[archiveofpain]

Yeah, currently struggling with something similar with my best friend. Stalking them is a massive trigger for me though like when I can see them online and imagine what they are looking at or who they are talking to and I lose my shit, in the end I will get mad over things that I do myself and it sucks

Sometimes keeping a distance or distracting yourself helps, when I'm busy I feel I don't think about them much

 

[whywere]

1st off, WELCOME to SaSu! It is great having you here as a new friend.

To be completely honest, stalking is on the extreme side and may not have the best outcome LONG TERM.

Back in the 1970', yep, I am older, I really liked a gal, and she embarrassed me to the whole community where I lived, so mind turned out horribly.

Your intentions by now are clear as day and then back off and give him some space to not only get used to you, but no matter also how long you two have known each other, and let attraction take place. Nothing of any value comes in a flash, one plants seeds in the garden and then months later harvest a bountiful crop.

Also, you are NOT EVER a horrible person, emotions can be very intense with anyone and that does NOT make you a horrible person EVER PERIOD.

Take a deep breath, give the lad some space and watch the garden (love) grow.

Walter

 

[FoxSauce]

Yes sadly but I try not to go all out. Stalk socials or thinking about them non stop or just fantasizing.

Sometimes is better to keep some people at arms length. Im just trying to hurt them

 

[_AllCatsAreGrey_]

Hi OP. What you're describing sounds like limerence. This is very common. I have been through it. The intensity of feeling can be overwhelming.

Here is a write-up about limerence:

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/basics/limerence/amp

There's a lot on the web about ways to pass through it. Remember this is normal human feeling and you are not alone in this experience.