Getting better ?

[Housefly]

The meds have had it's time to settle in and I'm reaching back out to old friends and family. On paper I'm getting better, I'm going on job interviews and exercising and the ideation is like a whisper in the background of a metal concert. However, there is still a problem. I still don't value money or work or doing anything new. It all feels the same but not in a bad way. More like a sunset is pretty and you appreciate it and then everything is a sunset when it's not the rotting horror of depression. I'm rambling I know but I am trying to figure out if I'm really interested in recovering anymore. Nothing will actually change. I still have to work to survive, still have to watch out for other people who might hurt me, still have to put in the work to have a good life and I still don't care about any of that. I don't know what to do except forewarn my friends that me being around is still in question. Meds or no

 

[EternalShore]

And those are the horrors of life :) Everyone has to deal with those~ If you liked working, you likely wouldn't getting paid for it! >_< And people are always going to be evil! :( It sucks lots, but alas, 'tis true~
Personally, I don't really care about any of that as long as the one thing which I do care about actually comes to fruition (which always seems to be getting more and more hopeless by the day). Oh well! :(
Maybe having a life goal would help you :) Mine just makes me want to CTB more and more every day, but you just seem to need some motivation in your life so perhaps it will help you. :) Take my advice with a grain of salt tho. You seem far further along the path to recovery than I am! xD