For those who have decided but are struggling with fear.

[mute656]

First of all, you need to honestly assess your situation in life and make your own choice. It's your decision. I've seen many posts here from people who want to die but are held back by fear—talking about lacking the courage to take the final step. A 60-year-old man with a serious illness, seeing no future, but paralyzed by fear. I'm writing this for people like him.

If this post is against the rules in any way, I apologize to the mods, and please feel free to delete it. I genuinely just want to help.

If you've already made up your mind but the fear is stopping you from acting:

1. Choose your method. Let's say, for example, SN. Study the threads here to understand what's needed. Buy everything you need (SN, antiemetics, etc.).

2. Pick a date when you plan to do it.

3. The most important part: get tranquilizers (ideally Xanax).

Test them beforehand. Long before your CTB date, take a small dose (start with 1 mg, maybe 2 mg, or 3 mg) to see how it affects you personally. Everyone reacts differently. You need to know:

How long does it take to kick in?

Is the sedation too strong? (Without tolerance, even 1–2 mg can make you very drowsy.)
Your goal is to find the dosage that completely eliminates your anxiety, makes you feel calm and sleepy, but still leaves you in control of your actions.

4. Once you've found your effective dose, simply incorporate it into your CTB protocol. For SN, for example, take that dose of Xanax about an hour before you plan to ingest the SN.

When the anxiety disappears—thanks to the Xanax—all that's left is to follow the technical steps of your protocol. Focus entirely on the actions: measuring, mixing, drinking, lying down. Don't focus on your feelings; focus on the procedure.

I repeat: this post is only for those who have already made the firm decision to end their lives and take full responsibility for it. I am not here to push anyone toward suicide. I just want to help those who have decided, but are too afraid to move forward, find a way to overcome that final hurdle.

 

[Dinozauria]

That's genuinely a really good idea, thank you!

 

[idontknowwhatiam]

First of all, you need to honestly assess your situation in life and make your own choice. It's your decision. I've seen many posts here from people who want to die but are held back by fear—talking about lacking the courage to take the final step. A 60-year-old man with a serious illness, seeing no future, but paralyzed by fear. I'm writing this for people like him.

If this post is against the rules in any way, I apologize to the mods, and please feel free to delete it. I genuinely just want to help.

If you've already made up your mind but the fear is stopping you from acting:

1. Choose your method. Let's say, for example, SN. Study the threads here to understand what's needed. Buy everything you need (SN, antiemetics, etc.).

2. Pick a date when you plan to do it.

3. The most important part: get tranquilizers (ideally Xanax).

Test them beforehand. Long before your CTB date, take a small dose (start with 1 mg, maybe 2 mg, or 3 mg) to see how it affects you personally. Everyone reacts differently. You need to know:

How long does it take to kick in?

Is the sedation too strong? (Without tolerance, even 1–2 mg can make you very drowsy.)
Your goal is to find the dosage that completely eliminates your anxiety, makes you feel calm and sleepy, but still leaves you in control of your actions.

4. Once you've found your effective dose, simply incorporate it into your CTB protocol. For SN, for example, take that dose of Xanax about an hour before you plan to ingest the SN.

When the anxiety disappears—thanks to the Xanax—all that's left is to follow the technical steps of your protocol. Focus entirely on the actions: measuring, mixing, drinking, lying down. Don't focus on your feelings; focus on the procedure.

I repeat: this post is only for those who have already made the firm decision to end their lives and take full responsibility for it. I am not here to push anyone toward suicide. I just want to help those who have decided, but are too afraid to move forward, find a way to overcome that final hurdle.

I think it's frowned upon to test SN by ingesting it

 

[sulvumnolo]

The problem for me is my method requires a bit of exertion. Not painful but still. I thought I'd be easy. I wake up every day begging myself to end it. Yet I am to much a coward to jump off the stool. I wonder if that's purely survival instinct or maybe because I'm not as sure as I think I am.

 

[violetforever]

i wish i had medication like xanax to calm myself so i wont cry (if i do since i always am)

 

[RiftbornVeil]

Thank you for this post. My SI is quite frustrating, and testing what medication I'll take in advance is a thought that hadn't crossed my mind yet.

 

[behindtheveil]

Do You have any advice for exit bag users?

 

[Terrible_Life]

First of all, you need to honestly assess your situation in life and make your own choice. It's your decision. I've seen many posts here from people who want to die but are held back by fear—talking about lacking the courage to take the final step. A 60-year-old man with a serious illness, seeing no future, but paralyzed by fear. I'm writing this for people like him.

If this post is against the rules in any way, I apologize to the mods, and please feel free to delete it. I genuinely just want to help.

If you've already made up your mind but the fear is stopping you from acting:

1. Choose your method. Let's say, for example, SN. Study the threads here to understand what's needed. Buy everything you need (SN, antiemetics, etc.).

2. Pick a date when you plan to do it.

3. The most important part: get tranquilizers (ideally Xanax).

Test them beforehand. Long before your CTB date, take a small dose (start with 1 mg, maybe 2 mg, or 3 mg) to see how it affects you personally. Everyone reacts differently. You need to know:

How long does it take to kick in?

Is the sedation too strong? (Without tolerance, even 1–2 mg can make you very drowsy.)
Your goal is to find the dosage that completely eliminates your anxiety, makes you feel calm and sleepy, but still leaves you in control of your actions.

4. Once you've found your effective dose, simply incorporate it into your CTB protocol. For SN, for example, take that dose of Xanax about an hour before you plan to ingest the SN.

When the anxiety disappears—thanks to the Xanax—all that's left is to follow the technical steps of your protocol. Focus entirely on the actions: measuring, mixing, drinking, lying down. Don't focus on your feelings; focus on the procedure.

I repeat: this post is only for those who have already made the firm decision to end their lives and take full responsibility for it. I am not here to push anyone toward suicide. I just want to help those who have decided, but are too afraid to move forward, find a way to overcome that final hurdle.

And what should someone do who has no xanax and has absolutely 0 chance to get any xanax?

 

[mute656]

I think it's frowned upon to test SN by ingesting it

I didn't mean to test the SN itself. My idea is that if you are afraid and find it unbearable to take the SN, you can take Xanax an hour before and it will be much easier.

 

[idontknowwhatiam]

I didn't mean to test the SN itself. My idea is that if you are afraid and find it unbearable to take the SN, you can take Xanax an hour before and it will be much easier.

My bad, sorry

 

[BradGuy123]

SN is difficult to acquire and this has been talked about. What I haven't seen talked about is how difficult it is to obtain Xanax. My impression is that doctors are reluctant to prescribe it. "Try this less strong medicine first." "Have you tried therapy?"

 

[peewee]

anyone can get xanax from dealers if you cant get from docotors

 

[Terrible_Life]

anyone can get xanax from dealers if you cant get from docotors

and what if the person is a depressed person with no connections to any dealers? Someone who rarely goes out and who never went to a dealer?

 

[absolute failure]

and what if the person is a depressed person with no connections to any dealers? Someone who rarely goes out and who never went to a dealer?

Thats me xd

 

[idontknowwhatiam]

SN is difficult to acquire and this has been talked about. What I haven't seen talked about is how difficult it is to obtain Xanax. My impression is that doctors are reluctant to prescribe it. "Try this less strong medicine first." "Have you tried therapy?"

I got mine legally through an online website. I just had to meet with a nurse practitioner virtually

 

[HD72]

Thank you for this post. My SI is quite frustrating, and testing what medication I'll take in advance is a thought that hadn't crossed my mind yet.

Sorry trying to reply to original post but his darn site has so many glitches. Maybe it's just me.

 

[kitkat9234]

Wish I had access to benzos. My med lady refuses since I have a history of addiction.

 

[HD72]

First of all, you need to honestly assess your situation in life and make your own choice. It's your decision. I've seen many posts here from people who want to die but are held back by fear—talking about lacking the courage to take the final step. A 60-year-old man with a serious illness, seeing no future, but paralyzed by fear. I'm writing this for people like him.

If this post is against the rules in any way, I apologize to the mods, and please feel free to delete it. I genuinely just want to help.

If you've already made up your mind but the fear is stopping you from acting:

1. Choose your method. Let's say, for example, SN. Study the threads here to understand what's needed. Buy everything you need (SN, antiemetics, etc.).

2. Pick a date when you plan to do it.

3. The most important part: get tranquilizers (ideally Xanax).

Test them beforehand. Long before your CTB date, take a small dose (start with 1 mg, maybe 2 mg, or 3 mg) to see how it affects you personally. Everyone reacts differently. You need to know:

How long does it take to kick in?

Is the sedation too strong? (Without tolerance, even 1–2 mg can make you very drowsy.)
Your goal is to find the dosage that completely eliminates your anxiety, makes you feel calm and sleepy, but still leaves you in control of your actions.

4. Once you've found your effective dose, simply incorporate it into your CTB protocol. For SN, for example, take that dose of Xanax about an hour before you plan to ingest the SN.

When the anxiety disappears—thanks to the Xanax—all that's left is to follow the technical steps of your protocol. Focus entirely on the actions: measuring, mixing, drinking, lying down. Don't focus on your feelings; focus on the procedure.

I repeat: this post is only for those who have already made the firm decision to end their lives and take full responsibility for it. I am not here to push anyone toward suicide. I just want to help those who have decided, but are too afraid to move forward, find a way to overcome that final hurdle.

How people think they can get easy access to Xanax I do not know. I have a script and it took an act of god to get the wee amount I do. And just trying to get it filled is hell. Not that the amount they give me does anything. Nothing works and if you find yourself taking it just to try you can be setting yourself up for some major Side effects. People on this site seem to be very unaware of withdrawal and akathisia or tardive dyskinesia. Be careful before trying a med. U may be causing even worse problems. Not to mention flagging yourself in the system if u end up getting caught and never getting meds again. I wish I wasn't so sick or older so I knew how to navigate the dark web and get something decently strong like fentanyl (which is a whole other beast). Please trust me when I warn about meds I am so damaged. I'd love someone to help me with gas but with my
Luck I'd end up more brain damaged than I already am. Yay me. Good luck to everyone. I wish u could find peace.

 

[uselessmanz]

First of all, you need to honestly assess your situation in life and make your own choice. It's your decision. I've seen many posts here from people who want to die but are held back by fear—talking about lacking the courage to take the final step. A 60-year-old man with a serious illness, seeing no future, but paralyzed by fear. I'm writing this for people like him.

If this post is against the rules in any way, I apologize to the mods, and please feel free to delete it. I genuinely just want to help.

If you've already made up your mind but the fear is stopping you from acting:

1. Choose your method. Let's say, for example, SN. Study the threads here to understand what's needed. Buy everything you need (SN, antiemetics, etc.).

2. Pick a date when you plan to do it.

3. The most important part: get tranquilizers (ideally Xanax).

Test them beforehand. Long before your CTB date, take a small dose (start with 1 mg, maybe 2 mg, or 3 mg) to see how it affects you personally. Everyone reacts differently. You need to know:

How long does it take to kick in?

Is the sedation too strong? (Without tolerance, even 1–2 mg can make you very drowsy.)
Your goal is to find the dosage that completely eliminates your anxiety, makes you feel calm and sleepy, but still leaves you in control of your actions.

4. Once you've found your effective dose, simply incorporate it into your CTB protocol. For SN, for example, take that dose of Xanax about an hour before you plan to ingest the SN.

When the anxiety disappears—thanks to the Xanax—all that's left is to follow the technical steps of your protocol. Focus entirely on the actions: measuring, mixing, drinking, lying down. Don't focus on your feelings; focus on the procedure.

I repeat: this post is only for those who have already made the firm decision to end their lives and take full responsibility for it. I am not here to push anyone toward suicide. I just want to help those who have decided, but are too afraid to move forward, find a way to overcome that final hurdle.

I don't know if I can get Xanax, Instead of Xanax I'm looking at using alcohol right now. I also have Tylenol with codeine, will that work??? What do you think?

 

[pelicanportal]

I only have the extended-release form of alprazolam, the XR one. I feel like that fucks it all up. Any guidance?

 

[uselessmanz]

I only have the extended-release form of alprazolam, the XR one. I feel like that fucks it all up. Any guidance?

Access to alcohol?

 

[pelicanportal]

Access to alcohol?

Yes.

 

[uselessmanz]

I think that's my next choice. I need it to work so hopefully I get it done!

Yes.

 

[pelicanportal]

Ok so does XR work or do I need to crush it or no

 

[uselessmanz]

Ok so does XR work or do I need to crush it or no

Whats XR?

 

[mute656]

I only have the extended-release form of alprazolam, the XR one. I feel like that fucks it all up. Any guidance?

I personally didn't feel anything at all from Xanax extended release, even in high doses.

 

[TomIsNotMyName]

I didn't mean to test the SN itself. My idea is that if you are afraid and find it unbearable to take the SN, you can take Xanax an hour before and it will be much easier.

You should probably make this a bit clearer in your post. If one person interpreted it as "test the SN before your CTB" (DONT DO THIS!!), other's might too

 

[myattempt]

Are there any side affects I usually don't take downers/ depressants because they make feel well more depressed and I can't really perform any tasks I just cry for hours and can't think straight but I think that's it's different I'm assuming bcz those side effects are from h

 

[Defenestration]

Avant toute chose, vous devez évaluer honnêtement votre situation et faire votre propre choix. C'est votre décision. J'ai vu beaucoup de messages ici de personnes qui souhaitent mourir mais qui en sont empêchées par la peur ; elles parlent d'un manque de courage pour franchir le pas. Un homme de 60 ans, atteint d'une grave maladie, sans espoir d'avenir, est paralysé par la peur. J'écris ceci pour des personnes comme lui.

Si ce message enfreint les règles, je m'en excuse auprès des modérateurs et vous invitez à le supprimer. Je souhaite sincèrement aider.

Si vous avez déjà pris votre décision mais que la peur vous empêche d'agir :

1. Choisissez votre méthode. Prenons par exemple la SN. Consultez les discussions ici pour comprendre ce qui est nécessaire. Achetez tout le nécessaire (SN, antiémétiques, etc.).

2. Choisissez une date pour le faire.

3. Le plus important : se procurer des tranquillisants (idéalement du Xanax).

Testez-les au préalable. Bien avant la date prévue de votre test de provocation orale, prenez une petite dose (commencez par 1 mg, puis 2 mg ou 3 mg) pour observer ses effets personnels. Chaque personne réagit différemment. Il est important de savoir :

Combien de temps faut-il pour que ça fasse effet ?

La sédation est-elle trop forte ? (Sans tolérance, même 1 à 2 mg peuvent provoquer une forte somnolence.)
Votre objectif est de trouver le dosage qui élimine complètement votre anxiété, vous procure une sensation de calme et de somnolence, tout en vous laissant le contrôle de vos actions.

4. Une fois votre dose efficace déterminée, intégrez-la simplement à votre protocole CTB. Par exemple, pour le SN, prenez la dose de Xanax environ une heure avant l'ingestion prévue du SN.

Une fois l'anxiété dissipée (grâce au Xanax), il ne vous reste plus qu'à suivre scrupuleusement le protocole. Concentrez-vous uniquement sur les actions : mesurer, mélanger, boire, vous allonger. Ne vous attardez pas sur vos sensations ; concentrez-vous sur la procédure.

Je le répète : ce message s'adresse uniquement à celles et ceux qui ont pris la décision ferme de mettre fin à leurs jours et qui en assument pleinement la responsabilité. Je ne suis pas là pour inciter qui que ce soit au suicide. Je souhaite simplement aider celles et ceux qui ont pris cette décision, mais qui ont trop peur de passer à l'acte, à trouver le moyen de surmonter cette ultime épreuve.

Thank you for this post. I take benzodiazepines every day, morning and evening, and they no longer have any effect on me...even at the beginning when I took them, I felt sedation but not a disappearance of the fear...so for SI, I don't think it will work even if I take much more than usual, and there's a risk for SN that if I take it too early I won't be able to properly prepare the SN: weighing, adding the necessary amount of water, it requires precision

 

[RiftbornVeil]

Sorry trying to reply to original post but his darn site has so many glitches. Maybe it's just me.

You're all good! My connection varies as well haha