Failed hanging

[Ambie]

This is fucking hopeless. I tried to hang myself yesterday and After maybe 1 second i get this rush of extreme panic and really strong deja vu-like feeling, i've been in this situation before .. It was absolutely terrifying and it took me like an hour to stop shaking and panicking afterwards. When I was a kid I was almost murdered and I have really bad ptsd because of that. So apparently death is the worst possible trigger. if I try to kill myself its like my childhood all over again. Theres just no way i'm going to overcome the survival instinct if I'm in the middle of a flashback of my worst fears. I dont think changing the method would help either, i dont have access to N or guns here in Europe so hanging is my best choice. Its just infuriating that ptsd is the reason i want to die and its the same fucking reason why I cant do it. i dont know what to do. Can someone please help how can I ctb without going to the state of panic and terror?? The thought of living through one more day in this hellhole is fucking unbearable

 

[hybridtheory]

just get some pills that'll knock you out and get drunk or tie your hands so you're not tempted to stop it .. if that's what you really want.

 

[Ambie]

just get some pills that'll knock you out and get drunk or tie your hands so you're not tempted to stop it .. if that's what you really want.

I don't want to be intoxicated. the risk of messing it up is too high. Tying my hands could work though, but it will be far from peaceful death

 

[Soul]

I'm sorry you're going through this. I know you feel your reaction isn't related to the method, but I think I'd try carbon monoxide, since people readily die of that in their sleep. It's a bit tricky to set up properly, but if I had a car and healthy lungs ... ?

 

[Ambie]

I'm sorry you're going through this. I know you feel your reaction isn't related to the method, but I think I'd try carbon monoxide, since people readily die of that in their sleep. It's a bit tricky to set up properly, but if I had a car and healthy lungs ... ?

Can you do it without a car? It sounds very complicated...

 

[Soul]

People use cars because they need a small space that can be made pretty airtight. There's information about it in the Peaceful Pill Handbook, which you can find in the List of Resources near the top of the forum.

 

[Coolchicka]

I'm sorry you're going through this. I know you feel your reaction isn't related to the method, but I think I'd try carbon monoxide, since people readily die of that in their sleep. It's a bit tricky to set up properly, but if I had a car and healthy lungs ... ?

would it be an issue if you had asthma?