Everyone always ends up leaving..

[bl33ding_heart]

It's impossible for me to make friendships without getting abandoned like an old dusty toy being left on a shelf. Throughout my whole entire childhood, every single friend I have ever had has ended up leaving me. Either because they grew out of me and I'm no longer entertaining enough for them, or because I'm too weird and abnormal and it's uncomfortable for their narrow minds to comprehend. Half of me has given up caring about having friends. If being alone is what fate wants for me, then I don't see a point in fighting. I will just die on this hill. But the other half of me desperately craves and seeks out emotional connections with others. I have a very loving and caring partner which I'm incredibly grateful for, but it will never be enough to fulfill the longing of just one good understanding friend my heart has.

 

[Hollowman]

It's impossible for me too.

 

[Ch4in3dcr0w]

Im so sorry to hear about your experience. Its really unfortunate u meet people like that in your life who abandon you when things get hard but its possible to make friends just no one meaningful (not including your partner) happend to be in your life, there is still hope if your partner is one of the people that care for you that only means there are more people who will care for you and cherish you. People who are worthy of you and your company will stay and those people will appear in your life im sure of it. Much love and take care

 

[snooperdooper]

It's impossible for me to make friendships without getting abandoned like an old dusty toy being left on a shelf. Throughout my whole entire childhood, every single friend I have ever had has ended up leaving me. Either because they grew out of me and I'm no longer entertaining enough for them, or because I'm too weird and abnormal and it's uncomfortable for their narrow minds to comprehend. Half of me has given up caring about having friends. If being alone is what fate wants for me, then I don't see a point in fighting. I will just die on this hill. But the other half of me desperately craves and seeks out emotional connections with others. I have a very loving and caring partner which I'm incredibly grateful for, but it will never be enough to fulfill the longing of just one good understanding friend my heart has.

Yes, I find it really difficult to retain friendships if I even consider seeking ones. It's funny because, before my depression started, I was able to easily integrate myself into friend groups. I guess integrate is the wrong word, I wasn't really "in" any friend group but that's an entirely different subject. I hope you are able to find the companionship you need.

 

[Doll Steak]

I haven't made a friend in 6 or 7 years. The few I do have, we have grown distant, and its never been that kind of close comfortable friendship like the ones you can really pour your heart out to. More of just ones you speak to when you're bored. Hope things can get better for you in that regard though.