Venting Don't know what to do

[KenDuh]

Right now it's 3 a.m., and I haven't gone to sleep yet because I've been very nervous every day for over a month now. Similarly, for some time now, I haven't been able to find motivation for anything. I suffer from depression and anxiety, which explains a lot. I don't know what to do with my time, but at the same time, I feel like it's never enough. I don't know what to do during the day, I can hardly sleep, and I hate getting up. I stick to the same routine every day because it keeps me from feeling much worse. I don't know why I'm living. The days are annoying, and there's no satisfaction on the other side. I want to stop feeling this way, but I can't. I don't know how to do it. I try to talk to people or distract myself by reading, but even that isn't enough. I don't feel alive, and it's annoying to live each day. Ctb is not an option. I'm going to keep living, but I don't know how to make life more bearable. Every day feels horrible and leaves me more and more exhausted.

 

[Baisley]

Have you tried going to see a doctor maybe medication could help you to feel better or therapy? I am sorry you are feeling so bad and I hope you get some help so that you feel better .

 

[KenDuh]

Have you tried going to see a doctor maybe medication could help you to feel better or therapy? I am sorry you are feeling so bad and I hope you get some help so that you feel better .

Yeah, I'm in therapy, with a psychologist and a psychiatrist, but it just doesn't help me. They do things about my anxiety, but it never really disappears, and also they can't give me meaning in life and I don't know where to find it. And thanks

 

[heatnormal]

maybe do something that you've always wanted to try, but for some reason didn't? have you ever tried to create something yourself? it can also be a biological issue; i don't want to sound nosy, but maybe get some blood work to check for any deficiencies? maybe a side effect from meds, if you take any?

 

[KenDuh]

maybe do something that you've always wanted to try, but for some reason didn't? have you ever tried to create something yourself? it can also be a biological issue; i don't want to sound nosy, but maybe get some blood work to check for any deficiencies? maybe a side effect from meds, if you take any?

I tried to do new things, or things that I used to like but it just feels like a responsibility, I don't really enjoy the things I do, I just do them so I don't feel too bad, and yeah I got some tests done but everything seems to be right

 

[heatnormal]

that's unfortunate. i get that you've been like this for quite a while now? is this a particularly long depressive episode, much worse than what you're used to?

 

[KenDuh]

that's unfortunate. i get that you've been like this for quite a while now? is this a particularly long depressive episode, much worse than what you're used to?

Not really, I mostly live depressed, just trying to feel something, and sometimes I do, I find I little bit of joy, but right now I get nothing, Idk what to do, or if I should just wait for things to feel better.