@claracatchingthebus What is DBT ?
my university exams went so badly and this was my final attempt to resit. The exam was so hard. If I fail this I will not get my degree. I can't cope anymore with waiting for my results. I can't sleep at night and every dream I failed everything. It feels so real I can't escape this anymore.
I am losing my mind everyday I want it all to stop.
DBT is dialectical behavioral therapy and it's for people with intense emotions. I hate the term "borderline" because a lot of people just don't have any emotional protection buffer or armor; it's like everyone else has something in their brain to dull the pain of life and "borderline" people just don't have it. And it's not necessarily something pharmaceuticals help with if you have this issue, and I'm not sure if you do. Dialectical Behavioral Therapy is a specific way of trying to deal with life, a guide, for people who are extremely sensitive. It's sort of like emotional training for super sensitive people with strong emotions.
Incidentally, they just essentially cured Huntington's Disease, which is unbelievable, but I'm rethinking everything in life. So many diseases are being cured, they may have much more effective treatments for mental health issues, including Borderline Personality Disorder (a name that I loathe) and Treatment Resistant Depression, in another decade. Some people have suggested renaming Borderline Personality Disorder as Emotion Intensity Disorder, which is much more accurate in my mind. I don't feel like my super overwhelming emotional reactions to things are a part of me, I feel like it's something else, seperate from me, like it's something that blocks my real personality and who I want to be and is actually caused by something specific, even of I don't know what it is.
It's possible you did fail your exams but it's also possible the exam was a hard exam and you did fine. Usually when exams are hard, certain questions many people will get wrong. I hope you pass, and if you don't, you could always just hospitalize yourself for a week or so if you wanted to be able to see the situation clearly. It wouldn't take away your choice forever. And you may end up passing.
If you end up doing DBT, I would suggest the actual Marsha Linehan DBT program, not just a therapist labeling you as borderline and talking with you. They are very different things, usually DBT programs are also done in groups of people, and that may be part of why it's effective.