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PotSmokingSloth

PotSmokingSloth

Uncertainty & Impermanence
Sep 13, 2021
80
It hurts so much right now. I've been talking to people but still feel very alone.

I know that Death will eventually happen one way or another and relieve my suffering; but still, I get this sense of dread and impending doom.

The depression is fierce, I'm constantly fatigued and everything feels sharp and pointy and scary to engage with. I'm afraid of the future especially. I'm also too afraid to ctb and so what's left but trying to work on my mental health to minimize how awful I feel. But damn it's hard and the difficulty of everyday normal tasks is relentless. So I'm just doing the best I can I guess...
 
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Reactions: t0rnbetween, CC123, m13here and 10 others
FuneralCry

FuneralCry

Just wanting some peace
Sep 24, 2020
42,615
I wish you the best with getting better. I hope things work out for you. Being alive really is horrible, I understand how you feel. I also have a lot of dread towards the future. I do find it comforting that death will come for us eventually, but that does not ease the suffering I am currently experiencing.
 
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T

timf

Enlightened
Mar 26, 2020
1,371
Have you tried various supplements to combat depression. Two that are often overlooked are SAMe (by prescription in Europe for depression but available over the counter in the US). I have read about Fava beans being able to boost dopamine levels, but have not heard from anyone who tried this.

There are a lot of things to try (most have no effect). However, sometimes you can stumble across something that works for you neurology.

It can be overwhelming to fight against both life and biology. If you can get an advantage over biology, it can be a significant advantage.
 
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miserableforever

miserableforever

Arcanist
Oct 23, 2020
488
It hurts so much right now. I've been talking to people but still feel very alone.

I know that Death will eventually happen one way or another and relieve my suffering; but still, I get this sense of dread and impending doom.

The depression is fierce, I'm constantly fatigued and everything feels sharp and pointy and scary to engage with. I'm afraid of the future especially. I'm also too afraid to ctb and so what's left but trying to work on my mental health to minimize how awful I feel. But damn it's hard and the difficulty of everyday normal tasks is relentless. So I'm just doing the best I can I guess...
You're still here, you're doing good. I know how that feels. Every day should be precious but then you wake up tired, ready for bed again cause nothing ever gets better.
 
PotSmokingSloth

PotSmokingSloth

Uncertainty & Impermanence
Sep 13, 2021
80
I wish you the best with getting better. I hope things work out for you. Being alive really is horrible, I understand how you feel. I also have a lot of dread towards the future. I do find it comforting that death will come for us eventually, but that does not ease the suffering I am currently experiencing.
Thank you
Have you tried various supplements to combat depression. Two that are often overlooked are SAMe (by prescription in Europe for depression but available over the counter in the US). I have read about Fava beans being able to boost dopamine levels, but have not heard from anyone who tried this.

There are a lot of things to try (most have no effect). However, sometimes you can stumble across something that works for you neurology.

It can be overwhelming to fight against both life and biology. If you can get an advantage over biology, it can be a significant advantage.
Thanks for the input; I've tried a lot but will continue trying more
You're still here, you're doing good. I know how that feels. Every day should be precious but then you wake up tired, ready for bed again cause nothing ever gets better.
Thanks. I've been managing to force myself out of bed but damn it's uncomfortable. Gotta fight the fatigue though and not let it keep getting the best of me
 
Last edited:
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Pluto

Pluto

Cat Extremist
Dec 27, 2020
4,862
It is important to have the right support. We become our own worst enemies when our minds turn against us. Good, trustworthy people are essential.
 
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C

checkedout

Member
Nov 6, 2021
15
It hurts so much right now. I've been talking to people but still feel very alone.

I know that Death will eventually happen one way or another and relieve my suffering; but still, I get this sense of dread and impending doom.

The depression is fierce, I'm constantly fatigued and everything feels sharp and pointy and scary to engage with. I'm afraid of the future especially. I'm also too afraid to ctb and so what's left but trying to work on my mental health to minimize how awful I feel. But damn it's hard and the difficulty of everyday normal tasks is relentless. So I'm just doing the best I can I guess...
Wow, I can relate to this a lot. The part about talking to people but still feeling alone.... Have you found anywhere here on SS that you can talk to, that maybe makes you feel a little less alone?

Depression is relentless, and every little thing feels impossible. I find that focusing on one thing and breaking it down into smaller tasks, as much as I can, helps sometimes. Otherwise, it can be pretty overwhelming.

You are doing the best you can right now, and that's enough. I'm sorry you're hurting so much right now.
 
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Reactions: PotSmokingSloth and Beeper
M

m13here

Member
Oct 16, 2021
13
It hurts so much right now. I've been talking to people but still feel very alone.

I know that Death will eventually happen one way or another and relieve my suffering; but still, I get this sense of dread and impending doom.

The depression is fierce, I'm constantly fatigued and everything feels sharp and pointy and scary to engage with. I'm afraid of the future especially. I'm also too afraid to ctb and so what's left but trying to work on my mental health to minimize how awful I feel. But damn it's hard and the difficulty of everyday normal tasks is relentless. So I'm just doing the best I can I guess...
I understand you completely. I've gone through cycles of depression, but honestly this last one is probably my worse one. I feel so alone and completely empty.
It's so damn hard and I'm trying so hard to stay afloat.
 
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