My older sister cut me out of her life. She says that she can't gauge my attitude and knows I'm upset with her and decided to end things. Thing is, shes transphobic, listens to conspiracy theories, and hangs out with literal confederates. I can't stand her political takes because they directly harm the people I care about ( including herself) The only thing I did was limit my contact. But in all honesty maybe I'm the one who cut her off first.
But this hurts so bad because I was so close to her due to us being the only biological family we had at the time. Now I just wanna discard that part of myself. I'm so angry at her. I don't think I'll ever stop. But I'm so sad too. She's a hypocrite and ignorant. But she's still my sister. I never was able to look up to her, but I thought she was a really cool person until I found out about her ideology. I'm so angry because we fought so hard to be sisters and now it just doesn't matter anymore. It wasn't my parents manipulation or their control over me seeing her. It was just her and her piss poor excuses to justify her actions.
I think it's best she did this. But I feel like I lost someone so close to me. I'm angry that I'm so hurt by it cuz I shouldn't be. She shames my body, she undermines my opinions, and thinks she knows everything because she's my older sister. She wants me to be somebody I'm not and wants me to be her shoulder to cry on. I'm so fuckin done. I don't want her in my life either. If people are just gonna leave me anyway there's no point. I keep trying to keep myself together but I just want to stab myself to stop feeling so much pain. I want to kill myself so badly just so I could hurt her. But she has a family. Whatever we have doesn't matter anymore. I just want her to feel what I'm feeling and she probably has. I'm just as pathetic as her tho so I guess it doesn't matter
But this hurts so bad because I was so close to her due to us being the only biological family we had at the time. Now I just wanna discard that part of myself. I'm so angry at her. I don't think I'll ever stop. But I'm so sad too. She's a hypocrite and ignorant. But she's still my sister. I never was able to look up to her, but I thought she was a really cool person until I found out about her ideology. I'm so angry because we fought so hard to be sisters and now it just doesn't matter anymore. It wasn't my parents manipulation or their control over me seeing her. It was just her and her piss poor excuses to justify her actions.
I think it's best she did this. But I feel like I lost someone so close to me. I'm angry that I'm so hurt by it cuz I shouldn't be. She shames my body, she undermines my opinions, and thinks she knows everything because she's my older sister. She wants me to be somebody I'm not and wants me to be her shoulder to cry on. I'm so fuckin done. I don't want her in my life either. If people are just gonna leave me anyway there's no point. I keep trying to keep myself together but I just want to stab myself to stop feeling so much pain. I want to kill myself so badly just so I could hurt her. But she has a family. Whatever we have doesn't matter anymore. I just want her to feel what I'm feeling and she probably has. I'm just as pathetic as her tho so I guess it doesn't matter
