Chronic Suicidality

[farewell_lover]

It sucks when you have had thoughts of it, even planned the details in your head but never went further to actually execute. I am getting old and I cannot tolerate being alive and depressed and miserable...

 

[pinkydrinky]

i understand you. i've had a date planned out before and that date came and went and i am still here. i question my life almost daily. no idea why im here, no idea why im not either

 

[unluckysadness]

Suicidal thoughts sucks. I'm jealous of people doing it impulsively without overthinking for years.

 

[cemeteryismyhome]

If it weren't for a few people somewhat dependent on me I'd be gone by now. Sometimes I slip into fully believing they will be better off without me, and one of these days when I'm in that state I very well may ctb. Most of the time, I'm basically sitting in a prison waiting for the clock to run out. I have no use for the time I have left. Such a waste. I enjoy thinking of suicide. I enjoy imagining my inevitable death. I have a place in a cemetery and funeral arrangements made and paid for. The only thing in the way is time and this body that hasn't died yet. One awesomely great thing about getting old is time goes faster and natural death is within sight and closer with each heartbeat. Death is toying with me, annoyed that I'm not afraid of it and not trying to avoid it, I lust for it, so it makes me wait.

 

[Defenestration]

Les pensées suicidaires, c'est terrible. J'envie les gens qui passent à l'acte impulsivement, sans y réfléchir pendant des années.

Same

 

[UserFromNowhere]

It sucks. Even when you're feeling better, the thoughts still invade your mind, trying to push you off the edge. You might be in a state where you don't even want to die but the thoughts are there all the same. You can never get rid of them. You're just forced to deal with them. You're constantly left debating if, one day, you will end up doing it; no matter your circumstances. Not because you want to, but because the thought just weighs on your mind and you can't imagine a future where you don't end up dying by your own hand, unfortunate as it may be.

 

[Defenestration]

Exactly