People like you are wonderful, you take shit and turn it into smiles. You make the world a better place and all you ask for in exchange is a little bit of help and love to offset the pain you're going through so you can keep on giving.
I don't say that in a cheap attempt to cheer you up, I say it to remind you that it's not you that's at fault here. It's this piece of shit world we're living in. My friends say I'm like what you describe, one my best friend even says the world needs more people like me. But the world isn't kind to people like that no matter how much it needs them.
Whatever choice you make and for what it's worth, remember, you're not wrong for being good. It may not change reality or how you feel at the end of the day, but whether you look at the mirror in the morning of a new day or stare at God in their eyes after you ctb, do so knowing full well you weren't the one at fault.
