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GroundControl

GroundControl

Can you hear me, Major Tom?
Feb 3, 2024
42
My stepfather recently broke the news that doctors have found 6 "nodules" in his lungs - 10-15 mm - that are causing him lots of pain. Most likely some form of cancer - it runs in his family and he's been smoking for over 40 years. I have been making plans to CTB recently and now I'm teetering on whether or not to go through with them for my mother's sake. I still don't think I can take life much longer, but I'm faced with the dilemma of being a selfish bastard if I go through with it. Though, tbf, most of my family would call me selfish regardless.

I'm so tired.
 
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TransfemCutter

TransfemCutter

She/her
Aug 2, 2024
41
Regardless of what happens in the world around you. CTB is always going to be stigmatized, and the word "selfish" will be thrown around no matter what you do. The good thing is that you won't be around to hear it. No matter what people say about you; good or bad. You won't be there to experience it. The grief of your mother, the perception from your family. All of it should be irrelevant when making a decision to CTB. What's relevant isn't what will happen after. The world will keep spinning. What's relevant is that you will be at peace. That's how I view it for myself at least. I hope you find the correct choice for you. Stay safe, good luck <3
 
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