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kaleisgreatinsalad

Member
Mar 17, 2025
7
I have posted about PSSD before but not in the context of accompanied suicide. I have tried everything I can think of to try and fix this condition. I have tried Ketamine Therapy, CBT, EMDR, Trauma Therapy, and talking to friends and family. I have tried B vitamins, vegan diets, working out. I no longer have the ability to experience emotions, I cannot feel anything sexually. I view my family and my own mother as complete strangers. I look at them and no longer know who they are. They could die and I would be unable to cry or feel sadness. This condition is a sentence of a living death. I often feel some form of sadness I guess deep inside my mind that the old me is dead. Even if I had all the money in the world it wouldn't change the fact that I cannot enjoy anything. Nothing can fix this despair that I feel daily, my family is sick of me complaining but I think maybe if they knew the gravity of this condition they would feel more sorry for me. I gave up on trying to educate them on this condition because they do not care about my suffering. While they feel sorry for me they do not understand. I guess when the time comes and I tell them if they want to attend they will realize the extent of my suffering. I am posting this to vent my feelings. I want a death that doesn't leave me disabled or in a worse position. I think as a human being I can say when I have suffered enough. I have tried everything that I possibly can to try and get better that is reasonable. There are potential medications I could try but they could leave me off worse and most don't have proof they could help me. I cannot bear to suffer more through experimenting with medications that could cause me to crash. I experience a long list of side effects from the aftermath of stopping Cymbalta that persist to this day. While I will continue to live as long as I can I will have things set up so that I may have a peaceful death when I no longer want to suffer. I am posting this for my own peace of mind I guess and to at least tell someone how I am truly feeling inside without the risk of being institutionalized.
 
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Reactions: myriapoda, Bad Ending, itwillhappensoon and 1 other person
FuneralCry

FuneralCry

Just wanting some peace
Sep 24, 2020
43,380
That sounds so horrible what you have to go through, it's just so cruel and dreadful how there's all this extreme suffering and it sounds like you've suffered so much in this torturous existence, I hope you find peace.
 
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itwillhappensoon

Member
Jun 28, 2024
39
I can relate to you In this post , I also haven't experienced joy or happiness and I also probably won't cry if my parents die , the only thing I think about right now is death , I hope things get better for you , I hope you find peace
 
RunDown

RunDown

New Member
Jun 18, 2025
2
I have PSSD as well. I knew I would find someone else on this forum because it's that bad of an illness. My family doesn't understand it either. I feel so isolated and desperate. This disease is relentlessly continues to wear me down. I'm not ready to go yet, but like yourself, I want to be prepared for when the time comes. I want to go peacefully on my own terms. I hope you're doing alright and feel free to hit me back anytime.
 
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K

kaleisgreatinsalad

Member
Mar 17, 2025
7
I have PSSD as well. I knew I would find someone else on this forum because it's that bad of an illness. My family doesn't understand it either. I feel so isolated and desperate. This disease is relentlessly continues to wear me down. I'm not ready to go yet, but like yourself, I want to be prepared for when the time comes. I want to go peacefully on my own terms. I hope you're doing alright and feel free to hit me back anytime.
I am sorry to hear you have this as well my friend I have sent you a follow and I think if you follow me as well we can message each other. It would be good to speak with someone on here with pssd as well.
 

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