Are your parents the reason why you're thinking about or wanting to CTB?

[Sbetto]

Personally, yes, I consider my parents, mainly my father, to be the reason why I have thought about and am now determined to CTB. I cannot complain about having had a violent childhood or adolescence or suffering physical abuse, but I see my father as the cause of my many failures and setbacks, as well as the reason why I want to CTB.
Fundamentally, he never knew how to be a good parent.
It is probably because of him that I suffered from bullying during my school years, probably his fault that I did not have the experiences my peers did, probably his fault that I am insecure, probably his fault that, at 25 years old, I find myself in this unstable situation. I hate him for this, I despise him, and if I cannot hurt him, I will hurt myself, soon.

 

[overcastdays]

I mean historically, yes. like they aren't the reason I want cbt at the moment per se, but I feel like if they were different, I would have never wanted to to begin with. I am the way I am because of them, particularly my father. But what are you to do except play the cards you have been dealt, right? I feel like in that regard, it's my fault. I could have done better there. But yes, I suppose so.

 

[amomentspeace]

For me no. Sure they could've helped me and didnt but it's not their fault that I plan on CTB

 

[ma0]

Not really, it's mainly my own personal fuck ups that have led me here.

It's not like my parents helped though...

 

[DarknessAtNoon]

Ultimately the answer is yes. It was their neglect when I was a child that set me on the path that led me to this. The neglect was not intentional, it was just due to their own human flaws so I am not angry with them. This is the main reason I don't plan on leaving a note. I have no interest in hurting my parents further by making them fully realize their culpability in my death.

 

[dust-in-the-wind]

Indirectly they are probably part of the reason. If I didn't have a fucked up childhood maybe I wouldn't be so fucked up in the head.

 

[galaxid]

I mean technically yes, because I inherited my mental health problems from them. And I didn't exactly need to be born or anything. Also they're dead now, so that sucks too. Grief is no joke. But for the most part, the only reason I didn't get to this point earlier in life was because I was living for their benefit.

 

[overcastdays]

And I didn't exactly need to be born or anything.

Oof. Relatable.

 

[NonEssential]

Not directly, since (I think) my parents love me, but we live rather terribly. I'm sure they try their best, but it doesn't seem to ever get better. It's a situation I'd prefer to escape rather than try to fix and if that makes me heartless coward then so be it.

 

[Manic Panic]

They aren't the reason but they didn't help ...they abandoned me and I barely talk to them anymore. I just hope when I'm gone they realize how awful they've been.

 

[thenamingofcats]

For me yes. I will never be able to live with the things they did to me, they should be in prison, not being free and having great lives.