Discussion About fate of ctb

[hiki4me]

Do you Guys ever think to yourself
"Why did this all Happen and why will i ctb"
Obviously most did probaly But i Just think myself is it really Just random what happend (Like Bad Situations)or Like smth Like fate
I am Not Sure what excatly i want to say with that but maybe some pepole are simply destined to ctb
I dont know If there is Like a god and He made it Like that or if its simply genetics

 

[weni]

I've been thinking about CTB since i was little because of domestic violence. Back then, i didn't know how, so I just endured and kept going. But now I feel like it's time. I feel obligated to CTB—because if I don't, an even worse future is waiting for me

 

[Gustav Hartmann]

I personal think that free will must be an illusion. I am also sure that we cannot know the future though the word is totally determinated. So, life is more like watchig a movie than playing a video game. If your movie will end with a suicide it is only natural that you watch youself as a suicidal person and this feels like destiny.

 

[GodChallengesMe]

Of course I do question everything that happened to me, especially very odd things like getting poisoned by the most lethal gas there is in this universe without even knowing I was getting poisoned at all. This kind of stuff doesn't happen to people normally and can be regarded as pure bad luck. I ask god (whatever generates and governs everything there is) why did it happen to me but the answer is right in front of my eyes even without asking to god in the first place which is ironic to think about it. I'm not going to delve into details but this event and the consequences it caused to my health and well being reflects particular things I've been doing to others in my life recently. What's more, the people I'm talking about who I harmed with my shitty behavior are not even my surroundings, I don't even know them, they exist only on my screen, virtually, but they are as real as I am so I got these exact same issues from god or whatever you call it. Again, I'm not going to delve into details but the idea is clear IMO. I deserved this and I'm not blaming anything to the higher powers at all, just beg them to acknowledge my remorse and let this suffering they brought to me end without further repercussions on the other side (when I'll be there).

What's more is that those higher powers (I don't like the term god as it entails to only one creature but there might be many powers out there) did such a thing to me that they know I won't endure and CTB myself if things doesn't get better miraculously. I don't know why they did such a thing that inevitably causes me to end this life too early but whatever their decision upon me is, I'm ready for that (although they know that my remorse is genuine so I'm not anticipating bad things to happen to myself). I hope I'm not doomed and will be saved from damnation and be offered peace and good options to choose from (or simply be forced into a good realm and experience without me choosing anything, that's also fine I guess).

 

[YandereMikuMistress]

I've thought about this allot too, growing up as Jehovah's Witnesses, I sometimes think it forced me to think about death more than I should've. I mean, I already wanted to die when I was little—before I even knew it was an option I could choose for myself. Like when my mom tried to commit suicide...
I'm still conflicted. Is all of this—life, pain, everything—run by some omnipotent god who gets their kicks from pushing their creations to the limit? Whether it's animals or humans, we're all basically the same: driven by emotion, even if numb.
And I don't know... a lot of the time, I'm convinced the answer is said right to our faces:
'Natural selection.'
'Survival of the fittest.'
I'm certain my death will be fated by my own hands,,
And if not that so be it, because there is no true control,, just some construct. just some construct,,we spin narratives around our own endings, grasping to notions of control tho ultimately were all just returning to dust,, idk idk, like the fuckin ocean tide rolling coming in an out it doesn't change that fact that Even if my hand guides the shot or compresses my chest,, it's still part of the larger rhythm of the inevitable, like a necessary unraveling, somtimes I think perhaps CTB isn't escaping fate, but *becoming* it like
maybe CTB is just another step in the grand cosmic disco of life, dramatic?
Whats the difference? emotions are bound to strike and happy or not you'll need to respond.
Are heartbeats are merely an unavoidably ultimately predetermined nonetheless,, even if one decides to take there own life.
Either way,
I suspect the universe won't notice, and why would it,, we are either inherently cruel without reason or there is some Omni present god willingly creating us to suffer,, but apparently many believe that's all in gods plan, giving you trails and hardships you must fight off to solidify your loyalty and unwavering belift to God! Fighting against the triumphs of satans evil attempts to delude the holy ones .

"Yea sweet pea all that happened to you because of God"