other-ghost
i need to end it
- Apr 5, 2025
- 69
Just a random... yap(?) I have to let out somewhere.
My SN arrived. I'll test its purity soon and finalize preparations. What I didn't expect is the quiet calm that came to me just knowing my exit is within reach. This peacefulness.. maybe a glimpse of the lasting peace i've yearned for?
I'm aware of how ungrateful this sounds. I have every resource for a stable life. But none of it fills the void where motivation should be. My mind rejects the script of "normalcy," even as i check every box for it. I don't crave existence. I just want to dissolve into a name without the burden of a body.
Yet here I am, finally breathing easy. Is this relief born from years of chasing an escape? Or is it the certainty that the door i've fought to unlock is now here? I don't know. But for the first time, I feel the world soften. Everything will be okay, not because life is better, but because the choice is mine.
My SN arrived. I'll test its purity soon and finalize preparations. What I didn't expect is the quiet calm that came to me just knowing my exit is within reach. This peacefulness.. maybe a glimpse of the lasting peace i've yearned for?
I'm aware of how ungrateful this sounds. I have every resource for a stable life. But none of it fills the void where motivation should be. My mind rejects the script of "normalcy," even as i check every box for it. I don't crave existence. I just want to dissolve into a name without the burden of a body.
Yet here I am, finally breathing easy. Is this relief born from years of chasing an escape? Or is it the certainty that the door i've fought to unlock is now here? I don't know. But for the first time, I feel the world soften. Everything will be okay, not because life is better, but because the choice is mine.
